College S3 Ep 21: Career Fair
Written by
William Fry & Michael Ledesma
INT. AUDITORIUM - DAY
Andrew, Edison, and Megan walk around a crowded auditorium filled with students, teachers, and other adults.
EDISON
Ah yes, the career fair. A place for prospective students to find internships and jobs.
MEGAN
And also to get free swag.
Megan holds up a bag full of swag.
ANDREW
Didn’t you also get a journalism internship?
MEGAN
Yeah but the swag is the real prize.
Edison stops walking.
ANDREW
What’s wrong?
EDISON
Andrew, look.
Edison points to a man dressed in a nice suit.
ANDREW
Is that who I think it is?
EDISON
Yep.
MEGAN
Any of you care to tell ME who he is.
ANDREW
That’s Justin Marfont. He’s a super-rich entrepreneur.
MEGAN
How rich is he?
ANDREW
He’s so rich, that Shark Tank won’t have him on because he’s richer than all the sharks combined.
MEGAN
Damn.
EDISON
This is it, this is the moment.
ANDREW
For what?
Edison Pulls out a condom-like object.
ANDREW
Please tell me that’s not what I think it is.
EDISON
The reusable condom!
MEGAN
Wait, that’s actually a real thing? I thought that was made up.
EDISON
Oh no, it’s real, and now's my chance to pitch it to a real-life entrepreneur.
ANDREW
Edison no.
EDISON
Too late.
Edison rushes over to Marfont.
EDISON
Mr. Marfont! Mr. Marfont!
MARFONT
Yeah?
EDISON
I have a life-changing product to pitch to you.
MARFONT
Listen, buddy, I don’t have time to listen to another product pitch. I’m just here for interns.
EDISON
I promise you, that you will love this product and it will be worth your time.
Marfont considers Edison’s offer.
MARFONT
It’s not another app, is it?
EDISON
No.
MARFONT
Okay then, you got 30 seconds. Go.
Edison holds up the reusable condom.
EDISON
Imagine you and your lady friends just finished having sex. You decide to go another round but uh oh, you’re out of condoms. Thankfully, you have “The Reusable Condom”. All you have to do is put it in the washing machine and boom, you have a clean condom.
Marfont stares at Edison.
MARFONT
I’ve heard a lot of product pitches. I once had a guy pitch me a cat dating site, but none have been as terrible as this one.
EDISON
What?
MARFONT
I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to decline. That’s disgusting.
Marfont walks away. Andrew and Megan catch up with Edison. Andrew pats his shoulder.
ANDREW
There, there buddy. How about we get some lunch?
Edison nods glumly.
INT. CAFETERIA - DAY
Andrew, Edison, and Megan sit at a table eating their food.
EDISON
I can’t believe he didn’t invest in it.
ANDREW
To be fair, it was always a long shot. I’m surprised he listened to the whole pitch.
EDISON
Oh well, maybe Mark Cuban will still invest. Of course, he hasn’t returned any of my calls.
Edison pulls out a small bottle of hot sauce and pours some on his burger.
ANDREW
What’s that?
EDISON
My grandma’s hot sauce. She always sends me a bottle once a month. Wanna try it?
Andrew nods and Edison pours some on Andrew’s pizza. Andrew takes a bite of his pizza.
ANDREW
Oh my gosh, that’s awesome. That’s the best hot sauce I’ve ever had.
EDISON
I’ll tell my grandma to send you a bottle.
ANDREW
Edison, I have an idea. Follow me and bring the bottle.
Andrew and Edison leave.
MEGAN
And I’ll just stay here and eat my food.
INT. AUDITORIUM - DAY
Marfont is talking to some professors. Andrew approaches him along with Edison.
ANDREW
Mr. Marfont.
Marfont turns around and faces Andrew.
ANDREW
My name is Andrew and this is my business partner Edison. We’d like to pitch a product for you.
MARFTON
Let me guess, a reusable tampon?
ANDREW
Better.
Andrew holds up the bottle of hot sauce.
ANDREW
Mr. Marfont, I present to you, the best hot sauce you’ve ever tasted.
MARFONT
Gentlemen, do you know how many food products I get pitched? A lot.
ANDREW
Not like this. Try it.
Marfont sighs and takes the bottle. He dabs some on his finger and tastes it.
MARFONT
Hmmmmmm.
ANDREW
Well?
MARFTON
It’s good, I’ll give you that. But there's a lot of hot sauce brands-
ANDREW
But how many of them are this good?
MARFONT
Tell you what, I need to do some market research. I’ll keep in touch.
Marfont hands Andrew his business card.
MARFONT
Mind if I keep the sauce?
Edison nods.
MARFONT
Talk to you soon.
Marfont walks away.
EDISON
Did we just… did we just successfully pitch a product?
ANDREW
I think so.
EDISON
Nice job man.
Andrew and Edison high five.
END.