ADAM, REAGAN, SAM, CHASE, LINCOLN, and MADISON are all sitting at their usual table at Lorenzo’s Kitchen when LORENZO and HARRY walk in.
CHASEWe have something to tell you guys.
LORENZO
Is it hello?
CHASE
No.
LORENZO
Hey?
CHASE
Nope.
LORENZO
Hi?
CHASE
We made an agreement with the maker of the grill to give Harry five thousand dollars.
HARRY
That was fast!
REAGAN
Right? We thought it would take a long time.
HARRY
So when’s that five thousand dollars coming?
MADISON
You should be getting it any day now.
HARRY
Thanks everyone. I should burn my hand more often!
LORENZO
How’s the food coming along?
REAGAN
We didn’t make any. No calls yet.
LORENZO
What?! I need customers!
REAGAN
Then open earlier.
LORENZO
This place isn’t open yet? What time does it open?
SAM
You’re basically right on time for opening. Stroke of luck I guess.
LORENZO
I should probably think of a special today.
LINCOLN
Do you know how to update your website with the special?
LORENZO
Nope. But I can make an in-store-only special.
MADISON
Not a bad idea.
LORENZO
What’s everyone thinking? French fries?
CHASE
French fries are a special?
LORENZO
Eh, I guess not.
REAGAN
How about hot dog ice cream?
LORENZO
Nah, then there won’t be enough for me to eat myself.
HARRY
Maybe a new type of cotton candy?
LORENZO
I’m over cotton candy.
HARRY
Really?
LORENZO
No.
Everyone sits in an awkward silence, with no one having an idea of what to make the special.
LORENZO
I have an idea!
HARRY
Gonna say it?
LORENZO
Sure. Artichoke juice!
REAGAN
That sounds absolutely disgusting.
LORENZO
I bought a lot of artichokes the other day and I’m not sure why. Dump some into a glass of sugary water and you have yourself artichoke juice!
MADISON
That just sounds like a terrible idea.
LORENZO
Alright, so artichoke juice it is. Harry, how much will that cost?
HARRY
Let’s see, the ingredients to make it cost around a dollar, maybe a dollar and ten cents.
LORENZO
Sell it for seventy cents then?
HARRY
Do you have any business acumen in you at all?
LORENZO
Nope. I’m just a guy who sells food if he doesn’t eat it himself first.
HARRY
Charge six dollars for it.
LORENZO
Six dollars? That’s insane? Not everyone has that kind of money to dump on artichoke juice!
HARRY
They’ll be interested in trying it, though. Charge six dollars today and never make it again. Simple.
LORENZO
If you say so.
LORENZO turns the Closed sign to Open at the door, and three people walk in.
CUSTOMER #1
Hey, I’ll have the—
LORENZO
Don’t tell me, I’m just the owner.
CUSTOMER #1
Okay then...who’s the waiter?
LORENZO (pointing to HARRY)
That guy over there. You’ll have to see him.
CUSTOMER #1
Or maybe he could approach us instead?
LORENZO
Not a bad idea.
LORENZO tells HARRY to take their orders.
HARRY
What can I get you all and why is it artichoke juice?
CUSTOMER #1
Sounds terrible.
HARRY
Six dollars.
CUSTOMER #1
Well if it’s six dollars it must be good...you know what they say, some things are more expensive for a reason!
HARRY
So three artichoke juices coming up?
CUSTOMER #2
I’d say so.
CUSTOMER #3
Fine with me.
LORENZO makes three artichoke juices. HARRY serves them.
CUSTOMER #1
This tastes...just like I’d expect.
HARRY
Anyone like it?
CUSTOMER #2
It’s better than hot dog ice cream, that’s for sure.
CUSTOMER #3
Tastes good.
The three customers leave after paying.
HARRY
That was a success.
LORENZO
I am full of great ideas, I know.
ADAM
You are?
LORENZO
Yep. In fact, I had a really great idea a couple days ago.
REAGAN
Do we want to know what it is?
LORENZO
Do you want to all be my legal team?
CHASE
What?
MADISON
Probably not. Nothing against you but...what is it, you’re suing a cotton candy machine?
LORENZO
Nope.
SAM
You want to tell us what this good idea is? Because Chase and I have a date to get to.
LORENZO
I thought you were already married.
SAM
We are.
LORENZO
Then why—eh, never mind, doesn’t matter.
LINCOLN
So Lorenzo, you were saying?
LORENZO
Oh! Right. I’m running for public office and need a legal team.
REAGAN
Um...
LORENZO
You guys want to be my legal team? I’m running for State Representative!
The group of lawyers talk quietly among themselves.
ADAM
Alright, we’ll do it.
LORENZO
Nice! So I’m taking a vacation from Lorenzo’s Kitchen for a few weeks. Have to travel for my side job.
HARRY
You mean your job as a major league bullpen pitcher?
LORENZO
Yep. So I’ll see you all in a few weeks, and we can discuss my campaign. I need to go to the kitchen now and eat some hot dog ice cream.