MADISON, ADAM, LINCOLN, SAM, CHASE, and REAGAN are all at LORENZO’s house.
LORENZO
Thanks for coming over, everyone.
ADAM
It’s time to get to work.
SAM
So are we just gonna hype up Lorenzo being stupid and work off of that?
LORENZO
Works for me.
CHASE
What? You should not be that compliant in an idea that makes you look stupid.
LORENZO
If it keeps me from going back to that jail, I’m fine with it.
REAGAN
Lorenzo, once again, you’re not going back to that jail no matter what.
LORENZO
Phew.
REAGAN
If you lose, you’re going to prison.
LORENZO
Is that worse?
REAGAN
I’d say. And since you’re just a buffoon and not someone purposefully committing campaign finance fraud, I’d say you also just remind the jury that you are, in fact, stupid.
MADISON
Now for the big question: Does Lorenzo plead not guilty or guilty?
SAM
That’s easy, he pleads guilty.
CHASE
You kidding? You don’t want anyone to get the idea Lorenzo was purposefully doing anything wrong. Not guilty.
ADAM
Yeah I’m also going with not guilty, seeing as that he’s not guilty.
REAGAN
Isn’t he though?
LINCOLN
We got the guy right here, let’s ask him: Lorenzo, are you guilty or not guilty?
LORENZO
We’ve been through this, I’m not guilty. All I did was fail to disclose the funds I was using on my re-election campaign.
ADAM
Yeah now I’m starting to think you’re guilty, Lorenzo.
LORENZO
But I didn’t mean to!
ADAM
Doesn’t matter.
LORENZO
Come on, they can’t send you to prison for accidentally committing a crime, right?
CHASE
Believe it or not, they don’t teach that in law school. At least, not our classes. That I remember.
SAM
Lorenzo, no matter what the intentions, the law is the law.
LORENZO
People love me here though. I promise I’m not corrupt!
REAGAN
We know that.
SAM
Also I would like to point out you lost re-election so I’m not sure just how much they love you.
LORENZO
They love me as a person, they just weren’t a fan of my policies. Whatever those were.
MADISON
So are we done here for now?
LORENZO
Yeah I’m good with this plan. Shall we watch the local news now?
CHASE
Let’s not.
LORENZO turns on the TV anyways. They are running a story about a man, GUS, who robbed a convenience store and was just released from prison and put on house arrest to accommodate the requests made by LORENZO. Everyone turns and looks at LORENZO.
LORENZO
He said he just took a pack of gum! I didn’t know he robbed a store!
MADISON
YOU KNOW THIS GUY?!
LORENZO
Yeah, we were good friends when we were in jail together! I thought he did nothing wrong so I asked if he could go on house arrest too. I guess now I know what she meant when she said she shouldn’t be doing that.
LINCOLN
Yeah this case is a lost cause. The jury is going to HATE you for this!
LORENZO
This can’t be as bad as it looks. Remember, I’m pretty dumb!
MADISON
Yeah. That was a pretty boneheaded move.
LORENZO
So maybe letting Gus out of jail early wasn’t my best idea. At least Carl has stayed out of the news.
LINCOLN
Carl?
LORENZO
Yeah, the other guy I got out of jail and onto house arrest. All he did was sell soda and they arrested him for selling cocaine.
LINCOLN
Track him down. Get whatever you can out of him about if he’s really a criminal too.
LORENZO
I’ll call him tomorrow. Good meeting.
SAM
Well that’s about all I can take for today. I wouldn’t say good meeting but I will say goodbye!
MADISON, ADAM, LINCOLN, CHASE, and REAGAN follow SAM out the door.