INT. LEVEL OFFICE - NIGHT
Freddy Dobson sits at a computer. The door opens and the Programmer wheels in.
THE PROGRAMMER
You know, you should take a break once in a while.
FREDDY DOBSON
It’s hard to take a break when the fate of the human race is in the hands of civilians.
THE PROGRAMMER
They’re succeeding just as I told you.
FREDDY DOBSON
Yes, I saw your reports.
THE PROGRAMMER
They will succeed.
FREDDY DOBSON
They better or else everything we’ve worked for… will have been for nothing.
INT. BATTLE ISLAND - DAY
It’s a wasteland. The “earth” is nothing but ash and dust. No sign that this was ever a lush island meant for one thing. Battle.
There is white flash of light, and the Phoenix Squad materializes in the wasteland.
TYLER
Look at this place. I wonder what it is.
DANIEL
Battle Island.
JOEL
How-
DANIEL
It’s the feeling. As soon as we jumped here, I felt… the need to watch my back. To fight.
GREG
I’m starting to feel that too. It’s familiar.
DANIEL
This is where Adrian launched that device that shattered the Refugium.
BAILEY
And somewhere, in all of this, is a piece of the antivirus.
In the distance, there is faint cheering.
DANIEL
Weapons out.
The group materialize their weapons. They walk up a hill toward the source of the cheering. They reach the top of the hill. Where the Focal once stood, is a gigantic arena.
JOEL
Um, okay.
DANIEL
If a piece of the antivirus is here, it’ll be down there.
The group make their way towards the arena.
EXT. ARENA – DAY
The group enters the arena. There are concession stands and hundreds of onlookers in the audience.
COMMENTATOR
Ladies and gentlemen, that was a knockout! Now, our next combatants in our combat of champions are… wait… Ladies and gentlemen, I’ve just been informed that the Phoenix Squad has entered the building. The champions of Battle Island have decided to compete in the combat of champions!
Security guards surround the group and gesture towards an opening. The group reluctantly follows. They enter the sidelines of the arena and are greeted with cheers.
COMMENTATOR
And there they are! The Phoenix Squad!
The crowd cheers louder.
COMMENTER
Are you ready to fight!
DANIEL
We’re not fighting anyone! We’re here for one thing!
COMMENTATOR
We’re all here for one thing, to fight for the ultimate prize. The Champion’s Trophy!
A spotlight shines on a golden trophy in the shape of a fist levitating above the arena. There are letters and numbers glowing on it.
GREG
I think we found what we came for.
DANIEL
How do we get the trophy?
COMMENTATOR
Your squad will each fight one of our champions. Defeat them all, and you win.
Daniel looks at the group.
BAILEY
Looks like we don’t have a choice.
Daniel nods.
DANIEL
Alright, we’ll fight!
COMMENTATOR
Did you hear that audience! It’s time to fight! Who’s first!
Bailey steps forward.
DANIEL
You sure?
BAILEY
Don't worry, I’ll be quick
TYLER
That’s what she said!
The group stares at Tyler.
TYLER
What, I never get to make jokes with y’all.
The arena door opens and Bailey steps into it.
BAILEY
Alright, who am I fighting?
On the other side of the arena, a door opens and a muscular woman wearing battle armor and wielding a battle ax enters the arena.
COMMENTATOR
Ladies and Gentlemen, Bailey versus, BATTLE BITCH!
The audience cheers.
COMMENTATOR
Now, battle!
Battle Bitch charges toward Bailey who stands nonchalantly. She raises her spear. As Battle Bitch closes in, Bailey throws her spears. It soars through the air and impales Battle Bitch in the head. Battle Bitch falls to the ground motionless. The crowd is silent.
COMMENTER
Ladies and gentlemen, looks like Bailey has defeated our former champion.
Bailey rejoins the group.
BAILEY
Alright, who’s up next?
JOEL
I’ll go. This’ll be easy.
Joel enters the arena and materializes his katana gun.
COMMENTER
Looks like our next combatant is ready to fight.
JOEL
Yeah yeah, just get on with it.
The door on the other side of the arena opens and a Ninja enters the arena.
COMMENTATOR
Joel versus Shadow Blade! Fight!
Shadow Blade pulls out two blades and charges at Joel. Joel shoots his Glock. Shadow Blade doges each shot.
JOEL
Shit!
Shadow Blade reaches Joel and swings his blade. Joel blocks with his katana. The two fight with their blades. Shadow Blade slices one of Joel’s legs and kicks him in the chest. Joel flies backwards and hits the arena wall. The crowd cheers.
Joel stands up.
JOEL
Okay, enough playing.
Joel raises his katana.
JOEL
Let’s finish this.
Joel and Shadow Blade charge at each other. Both swing their blades at each other and land on opposite sides of each other. Both stand still. Shadow Blade’s upper half slides off his body and his lower half spews blood. Joel stands up and raises his katana.
The audience cheers.
COMMENTATOR
My goodness, I heard the Phoenix Squad were great, but I didn’t know they were FANTASTIC!
Joel rejoins the others.
TYLER
My turn.
Tyler enters the area. The door on the other side opens and a whale/alligator kaiju hybrid bursts out of the entrance.
TYLER
What the fuck!
COMMENTATOR
Whaligator versus The Wizard!
Whaligator roars at Tyler and charges. It raises its flipper and brings it down. Tyler barely manages to block it.
DANIEL
Tyler, use your fucking staff!
Tyler nods. His staff materializes in his hand, and he raises it. He lets out a battle cry and brings the staff down. A blue light wave emits in front of the staff and hits Whaligator. Parts of the kaiju disintegrates. Tyler grips his staff harder, and the light wave grows brighter. Whaligator begins moving forwards towards Tyler.
TYLER
C’mon!
The light wave grows blinding and Whaligator disintegrates fully. The light dissipates and Tyler falls to the ground. Greg and Daniel run out to the arena and carry him off.
COMMENTATOR
Well, that was quite a sight.
DANIEL
Hey, you okay buddy?
TYLER
Y-yeah.
DANIEL
Just rest, okay?
Tyler nods. Greg enters the arena.
COMMENTATOR
Well, this is a treat! The chainsaw wielding syrup loving Greg! My, don’t we have a surprise for you.
The door on the other side of the arena opens. No one exits.
Then…
The sound of jingle bells is heard from the dark entrance of the arena door. It grows louder. Louder. LOUDER.
From the dark entrance door, a fat man wearing red and white battle armor with a sack on his back and a snowy white beard enters the arena.
JOEL
Is that-
GREG
Santa Clause, we meet again.
JOEL
I’m sorry what?
GREG
Long story. The Navy had a… few skirmishes with him.
JOEL
The fuck?
SANTA
Nice to see you again Greg. Tell me, how’s the arm?
GREG
Better now that I’m going to get payback.
SANTA
Looks like we can finish what we started. Don’t worry, I’ll kill you nice and fast. Just like I did with your Navy buddies.
Greg materializes his chainsaw and revs it up.
GREG
Let’s go fat man.
Santa puts his hand in his red sack and pulls out a giant reindeer antler.
SANTA
Ho Ho Ho.
Greg and Santa charge at each other. Greg brings his chainsaw down on Santa, but he blocks it with the antler blade. Greg pushes down but Santa doesn't budge. Santa pushes back and Greg slides backward.
SANTA
You’ve grown soft since last time.
Greg lets out a battle cry and charges. He swings his chainsaw but Santa blocks it with the antler. The antler breaks. Greg swings his chainsaw again and Santa dodges.
Santa pulls out two giant candy canes with sharpened tips. He lodges one of them into Greg's leg and the other in Greg’s back. Greg yells in pain and swings at Santa. Santa pulls out more candy cane knives and throws them. Greg is able to deflect some with his chainsaw but some lodge themselves in his shoulder.
SANTA
You could at least put up a fight.
GREG
I’m just getting started.
Greg throws his chainsaw at Santa. Santa stands aside and the chainsaw misses him. The chainsaw begins to return to Greg’s hand, but Santa catches it.
SANTA
I don’t get why you traded in your M4 for a chainsaw.
Santa tosses the Chainsaw to the ground.
SANTA
I got some new weapons myself.
Santa reaches into his red sack and pulls out a severed deer head with a red nose.
GREG
Is that… Rudolph?
SANTA
Did you really think that feeding him C4 would kill him?
GREG
Um, yeah.
SANTA
Well, it didn’t. Oh, Rudolph with your nose so bright, won’t you light up this motherfucker tonight?
The severed deer head begins moving.
RUDOLPH
It would be an honor sir!
Rudolph's nose begins glowing a bright red.
GREG
Oh shit!
A red laser shoots out of Rudolph’s nose and at Greg. Greg jumps out of the way. The laser hits the side of the arena wall and disintegrates it. Santa moves Rudolph's head towards Greg and the laser follows. Greg begins running. The laser is not too far behind him.
SANTA
Ho Ho Ho motherfucker!
GREG
Fuck!
Greg pulls one of the candy cane knives out of his shoulder and throws it. The candy cane knife slices Rudolph's nose off. Rudolph screams in pain. Santa throws Rudolph's head aside. Rudolph’s head lands on the ground and he continues screaming in pain. Blood spews from the stump of his nose.
Greg runs at Santa and punches him. Santa is unfazed. He chuckles. Santa punches Greg. He punches Greg again and again. Greg’s face becomes bloodier and more bruised. Greg steps back and spits out a broken tooth.
GREG
Is… Is that all you got FATMAN!
Santa glares at Greg. He reaches into his red sack and pulls out a staff with a star on top. Greg raises his fist and takes a pathetic swing. Santa dodges it and hits Greg in the stomach with the star staff. He twirls the staff rapidly, hitting Jay over and over. Greg’s blood sprays across the arena floor. Santa swings his staff in one big motion and hits Greg in the face. Greg flies back and lands on the arena floor with a THUD.
Greg coughs up blood.
DANIEL
Stay down Greg!
Greg starts crawling away towards the group.
Santa taps his star staff on the ground. The star on top pops off and hangs loose by a rope made up of Christmas lights. He swings the star staff and the star flies forwards and lodges itself into Greg’s back.
Greg cries out in pain as blood spurts from his back.
SANTA
You better watch out!
Santa pulls his staff back and Greg flies back towards Santa.
The star dislodges itself from Greg’s back and retracts into the staff. Santa grabs him by the throat.
SANTA
You better not cry!
Santa throws Greg to the ground.
SANTA
You better not pout I'm telling you why.
Santa turns Greg over with his foot. He is bloody and bruised. A pool of blood grows beneath him. Santa kneels next to him and draws a gingerbread knife.
SANTA
Cause Santa Claus is going to kill you. Any last words?
GREG
Just one.
Greg flicks his hand and his chainsaw flies into his hand.
GREG
Groovy.
The chainsaw revs up and Greg plunges the whirling blade into Santa's chest. The chainsaw grinds its way through Santa's chest. Blood and guts fly everywhere and paint the floor.
JOEL
Did… did he just… did he just kill Santa Clause.
DANIEL
Yes, yes, he did.
Greg stands up feebly. The audience is cheering.
COMMENTOTR
Well, that was something!
Greg limps off the arena and rejoins the group.
GREG
Your turn Dan.
BAILEY
Be careful.
Daniel nods. He enters the arena.
COMMENTATOR
Ladies and gentlemen, we are now at our last champion. If he can defeat our last champion, he’ll win the trophy! Now, let the final fight begin!
Daniel materials his tomahawks and readies himself. The entrance on the other side of the arena opens and Winston emerges from the entryway.
DANIEL
Oh, you have got to be shitting me.
WINSTON
Remember me.
DANIEL
How can I forget the guy who keeps trying to kill me?
WINSTON
This time, I won’t fail, and you won’t get that piece of code.
Winston opens his hand, and a long piece of rebar materializes in his hand.
DANIEL
Look, for the last time, it was an accident.
WINSTON
That accident killed my real-world body! The Programmer couldn’t save it! Now I’m just a fucking piece of programming!
DANIEL
So, you're working with Adrian? You realize he wants to destroy the simulation. YOU will be destroyed.
WINSTON
So will you.
Daniel lowers his tomahawks.
DANIEL
Look, I’m sorry. I… I didn’t know that we were in a simulation. I… I wish I hadn’t killed you. I think about it every day.
Daniel’s tomahawks dematerialize.
DANIEL
I won’t stop you. Take your shot.
JOEL
What the fuck are you doing! Kill him!
Winston yells and runs at Daniel. He hits Daniel in the head with the Rebar. Daniel falls to the ground. Winston hits him repeatedly. Winston raises the rebar above his head and prepares to impale it through Daniel's chest.
DANIEL
I’m sorry. You can still live. Like all of us. You just have to help us.
Winston hesitates. He can’t seem to bring the rebar down. He drops the rebar next to Daniel.
WINSTON
I’m… I’m sorry.
Daniel stands up.
DANIEL
Your body in the real world may be gone, but you are still very much alive, and you can stay that way. You just have to help us. Give us a chance to fix all of this.
Winston contemplates this.
WINSTON
Okay. I concede the match.
COMMENTATOR
And the Phoenix Squad wins!
The audience cheers. The group enters the arena and joins Daniel and Winston.
WINSTON
There’s something you need to know.
Suddenly the sky turns green. A bolt of green lightning strikes the arena ground and dissipates.
Where the lighting struck, stands Boss.
The group doesn't even hesitate. They materialize their weapons and raise them to fight.
BOSS
Is that any way to greet an old friend?
DANIEL
(To Winston)
I take it this is what you were going to tell me.
WINSTON
Yes.
BOSS
Winston, you’re still here. What are you doing with them?
WINSTON
I’m done being your pawn.
BOSS
Okay then.
Boss raises his hand and emits a green energy blast. It hits Winston who vaporizes.
DANIEL
No!
BAILEY
Tyler, now!
Tyler steps forward and raises his staff.
TYLER
(In Japanese)
Go back to where you came!
Tyler starts bringing his staff down but Boss races forward and catches the staff before it hits the ground.
BOSS
(In Japanese)
Too slow.
Boss punches Tyler in the stomach and he flies back. Bailey throws her spear and disarms Boss of the wizard staff. The spear returns to her hand, and she throws it again. Boss materializes his mace and deflects the spear. Greg swings his chainsaw but Boss blocks it. Another mace materializes in his other hand, and he swings it and hits Greg’s leg.
There is a sickening crack and Greg screams in pain. Boss swings the other mace again and catches Greg's head. Greg is thrown backward and falls to the ground. He does not get up.
Joel shoots his gun and hits Boss in the shoulder. Boss materializes metal armor and swings both of his maces. Joel blocks them with his Katana. Boss pushes down harder. Behind him, Bailey jumps in the air with her spear poised to impale. Boss kicks Joel in the chest. Joel falls backward. Boss turns around. One of his maces disappears and he grabs Bailey by the throat. Bailey drops her spear. Boss squeezes his hand. Bailey begins to turn blue.
A tomahawk flies through the air and hits the back of Boss’ armor. He drops Bailey and turns around. The tomahawk returns to Daniel’s hand.
BOSS
How many times are we going to have to fight until you understand that I can’t be stopped?
DANIEL
I’ll let you know.
Boss materializes both of his maces and Daniel raises his tomahawks. The two charge at each other and lunge.
Their weapons clash against each other. Both dodge and deflect the other’s blows. Boss disarms one of Daniel’s tomahawks and hits his side with one of his maces.
Daniel falls to the ground. Boss places his foot on his chest and places one of his maces next to his head.
BOSS
I know what I am now.
Boss raises the mace and prepares to swing. Daniel struggles to get up. His eyes turn blue, and he begins to glow.
BOSS
What in the-
There is a flash of blue light and Boss is thrown in the air and hits the ground with a deafening thud.
Daniel stands up. He no longer glows blue. The others stand up.
JOEL
What the hell was that?
DANIEL
I… I don’t know.
Daniel walks over to Bailey and hugs her.
DANIEL
Are you okay?
BAILEY
Are YOU okay?
DANIEL
I think so.
TYLER
Guys! Guys!
The group turns around. Tyler is kneeling next to Greg who is unconscious.
TYLER
He’s not waking up!
DANIEL
Programmer!
PROGRAMMER
I know I know! What the hell happened to you guys?
DANIEL
We ran into Boss.
THE PROGRAMMER
Adrian must have repaired him. I need to pull Greg out. His neural readings are off the chart.
TYLER
Wait, Greg has the pieces of the antivirus.
Tyler taps Greg’s gauntlet and the wine glass, the crystal ball, and the bottle of whiskey materialize on the floor.
TYLER
Okay.
Greg’s body dematerializes. Tyler begins to acquire the pieces of the antivirus.
Before he can do so, Boss charges at him and brings his mace down on top of Tyler's head. The force knocks Tyler's face into the ground.
DANIEL
No!
Joel shoots at Boss. Boss gathers the pieces of the antivirus and jumps. He grabs the trophy and disappears in a flash of light.
Joel and Bailey run over to Tyler. The back and front of his head have been crushed inwards.
BAILEY
Tyler? Tyler?
Tyler doesn’t answer.
JOEL
Tyler!
Daniel joins them.
DANIEL
Look.
Tyler’s face begins to expand to its natural state. His eyes open and he sits upright.
TYLER
Boss!
DANIEL
We know.
TYLER
The antivirus?
DANIEL
He’s got them.
TYLER
Fuck.
JOEL
How did you fix your face?
TYLER
I’m a wizard. Duh.
BAILEY
What now?
Daniel taps at his gauntlet. A spherical map pops up from the gauntlet.
DANIEL
I think I got an approximate location of Boss. My guess is that he's looking for the final piece of the antivirus. We need to find it before he does and get the other pieces back. We’ll need to split up. Joel and I will take this area.
Daniel highlights a part of the sphere map.
DANIEL
Bailey, you and Tyler will take this area.
Daniel highlights a nearby area.
The group nods.
Joel stands by Daniel and Bailey stands by Tyler.
DANIEL
We’ve come too far to fail.
The group nods. They all tap their gauntlets and disappear in a flash of light.
END.