Below is the first of six episodes of TVRGO’s new miniseries Let’s Get Presidential. The rest of the episodes will be available on Saturday on The TV Ratings Guide, or read them now at tvrgo.blogspot.com!
Open: Darnell is in a meeting with the staff of his multi-million dollar business behind the quiz website Quizzical Quiz, including Ronan (Chief Content Creator) and Colin (Executive Secretary).
DARNELL
I’ll keep this brief. I called you all in today because I’ve had enough.
RONAN
Enough of what? Are we getting fired?
DARNELL
No, you’re not. But I am.
COLIN
How can you fire yourself?
DARNELL
By quitting. I’ve started a company from the ground up, it’s become a success, but I’m tired of it. I’m done.
RONAN
Can’t say I didn’t see it coming, you’ve been mentally out of it for like two months. What are you going to do now?
DARNELL
Run for President.
COLIN
No seriously, what are you going to do?
DARNELL
I’m serious. I’m going to run for President.
RONAN
I’m afraid to ask of what.
DARNELL
Of the United States of America dimwit. You all can decide who’s taking over as the CEO of Quizzical Quizzy Quiz or whatever we’re calling it now.
COLIN
Wow. When are you announcing it?
DARNELL
Holding a press conference later today.
Darnell exits the room, gathers his belongings, and leaves.
Cut to Darnell, standing in front of a podium with many people from the local press in his presence.
DARNELL
Good afternoon. I am speaking to you today to officially say I am stepping down from CEO of, uh...my company, and running for President. Of the United States, that is. Of America. That’s all I got for my speech, anyone have any questions?
REPORTER #1
Sir, what caused this decision?
DARNELL
A bunch of things. Basically I love being in power but I’m tired of leading the company.
REPORTER #2
How will you fund your campaign?
DARNELL
Go to www.darnelllovesrunningforpres20.com and donate to my campaign! I’m accepting donations of all sizes, from as small as one thousand dollars all the way up past one million dollars! I am now assembling a staff to help me with this campaign.
Cut to Darnell at home, tuning into Cable News Channel. They are covering his announcement.
CNC CONTRIBUTOR #1
Businessman Darnell Tiles has announced his run for President, and man did he look sharp.
CNC CONTRIBUTOR #2
Yeah, I think he really has a shot at the nomination. It was quick, he was very transparent, very down to earth, and has an easily accessible website. Not surprising coming from one of the greatest businessmen in modern history.
CNC CONTRIBUTOR #1
It is true, everyone at CNC and really everyone I know visits Quizzical Quiz often, he truly is a genius.
CNC CONTRIBUTOR #2
He’s flawless. Outstanding start to his campaign, simply outstanding.
CNC CONTRIBUTOR #1
Outstanding indeed. More after this commercial break.
Darnell turns off the television, satisfied with his campaign’s start, as he expected to be. He calls some people, including family, friends, and fellow business executives to comprise of his campaign staff.
Cut to Darnell and his campaign staff, sitting in his oversized living room, eating pizza and drinking soda.
DARNELL
Lucky you, you’re all now part of the greatest Presidential campaign to ever exist. Not like I need much of a staff though.
TOMMY (Best friend and Campaign Manager)
Truly Darnell, a great start. You’ve already raised $4 million dollars on your website. Polls are easily getting you to the first debate.
PAM (Businesswoman and Debate Coach)
We really should start preparing for the debate.
DARNELL
Oh why would I need any preparing, people love hearing me talk.
SAL (Uncle and Head of Communications)
Some of the other candidates will go after you, and you will have to go after some of them as well.
DARNELL
Don’t worry about it, I got this.