FRAN
That was a disaster.
BRIAN
The important thing is that everyone made back to the house safely.
FRAN
I guess the lesson of the story is that we’re a strong family who can get through being separated.
ANDREW
It’s not if you go to church, you go through hell?
FRAN
Excuse me?
JOSH (to ANDREW)
Say something she’ll want to hear.
ANDREW
Let’s make Christmas cookies!
FRAN
Oh great idea Andrew! Let’s split up into the teams with the people we were supposed to sit with at church.
DAVID
You know Mom, it’s kind of sounding like you’re already running the family games.
FRAN
What? Nonsense!
JOSH (to ANDREW)
She is. Just go with it.
DAISY
It’s not really fair to split up in these teams, we’re only three people.
BRIAN
You can have Catherine.
NATE
No thanks.
CATHERINE
Yeah, he’s never seen me bake and that’s for good reason.
WILLIAM
Your brownies were good though.
BRITNEY
I had some good times eating those.
FRAN
Enough about brownies! Let’s make sugar cookies, whoever has the best-looking ones wins! Make them holiday-themed.
DREW
What do we win?
FRAN
Respect!
BRITNEY
Yeah I’m skipping this.
FRAN
You already skipped church, you’re not skipping this.
BRITNEY
Fine. We’re going to lose anyways.
CHRIS
We have nothing to lose when we already don’t have respect.
BRITNEY
True.
BRIAN
Let’s get going everyone, these cookies aren’t going to bake themselves!
MARY
There’s barely any room in the kitchen.
FRAN
And?
MARY
Alright then, I guess we’re all making cookies together in a small area.
[The family makes the cookies, with many people bumping into each other and almost nobody knowing what they’re doing.]
FRAN
Let’s taste them.
FRAN tastes a cookie made by STEVE, NATE, and DAISY.
FRAN
Wow, this is...wow.
STEVE
Do you like it?
FRAN
How much sugar is in this?
STEVE
How much sugar was in the bag in the cabinet?
FRAN
A ton more than you needed.
STEVE.
OK. Then a ton more than we needed.
FRAN tastes a cookie made by BRITNEY, BRITNEY 2, JULIAN, and CHRIS.
FRAN
These aren’t even cut like trees or bells or anything! Just big circles!
JULIAN
We wanted to keep it simple.
FRAN
These are terrible.
FRAN tastes a cookie made by William, Mary, Andrew, and Drew.
FRAN
Wow, these are amazing! What did you do?
ANDREW
I think the same thing as everyone else.
FRAN
Andrew, you and your team win!