Bake Your Heart Out Season 1, Episode 4 Part 2
The Guest Judge
Leslie: Hi Charlotte! We’re just talking about our plan for today’s show.
Charlotte: Oh, I thought I heard my name mentioned.
Leslie: We’re just talking about how we can best accommodate you and make your experience here a positive one.
Charlotte: I thought I also heard the word “diva” mentioned. You weren’t calling me a diva, were you?
Leslie: Charlotte. You know me. I would never. I would, however, call Frances a diva. Because she is one.
Charlotte: Why do you put up with her? She seems very hard to work with.
Leslie: If she wasn’t consistently ranked as the best pastry chef in the world, I’d never put up with her nonsense. At least I have you for this episode, you’ll balance out the crazy.
Frances: Hey! I’m right here!
Leslie: It had to be said.
Charlotte: Hey, I’m gonna run to my dressing room quickly before the bakers get here. Gotta make sure I’m nice and fresh for the cameras!
Leslie: You do that!
Charlotte runs to her dressing room, giving Paul the opportunity to converse with the gang.
Paul: So…
Frances: So what? You put someone on our show that’s not qualified at all to judge a baking competition. And you think I’m just going to take it? I won a James Beard Award!
Paul: We all know that! Leslie, control her.
Frances: Control me?
Leslie: Guys, please. Charlotte has been nothing but lovely to us since she got here.
Frances: Not to me. Why is it always fine to walk all over ole’ Frances?
Leslie: Because you’re acting ridiculous! All you have to do is stand there next to her as she says some variation of “that crème brûlée was delicious” eight times. This is all for ratings and you’re acting like a child! She’s not going to determine who goes home or anything, you’re just acting like a child. Stop!
Frances: Nobody on Frances In the Kitchen ever treated me like this.
Leslie: Because that was your show and this is mine! Just remove that stick from your rear end for one day and this will all be over!
Frances: So you really meant it when you called me a diva! Did you mean it when you said you would fire me if I could?
Sam: Awkward!
Diane: Sam, shut up!
Leslie: Frances, come on. Of course I didn’t. You can just be a lot to take in sometimes.
Frances: Just keep walking all over me, that’s very appreciated.
Paul: Just got a call from your co-producer Jen. You probably should’ve picked it up but I did your job for you this time. You’re welcome.
Leslie: Oh, bud off, Paul.
Paul: The shuttle carrying the bakers is going to be here late. It’s stuck in traffic and it could be an hour.
Frances: Lovely! My hell continues for another hour! I have to leave for now. I need to take a walk. Away from you all.
Leslie: That’s fine. Just be back soon!
Frances storms off the set.
Paul: What a diva.
Charlotte: Where’s Frances? Did I scare her off?
Leslie: No, I’m pretty sure I did, though.
Charlotte: Well what’d you do?
Leslie: I confirmed that I wasn’t joking and didn’t completely deny that I’d fire her if I could.
Charlotte: Oh Leslie. I thought we were all just joking around.
Leslie: Yeah, I thought so too.
Charlotte: Just wait for her to come back, then apologize to her in the most sincere way possible.
Leslie: You don’t know Frances. When she gets emotional like this, there’s no bringing her back to reality.
Charlotte: Yeah, that’s gotta stop too.
Leslie: What does?
Charlotte: Nasty comments like that. Frances is a person, too. Treat her like one.
Leslie: If I have to.
Garry: Can I just say that I am extremely impressed with you, Charlotte? You’re much different than I expected.
Charlotte: Glad to be exceeding your expectations!
Leslie: I have to be honest, Leslie. Because I feel like that’s the best policy. When you overheard us talking about a diva and saying your name, we were badmouthing you. Frances wasn’t very happy that you were guest judging and the rest of us weren’t exactly thrilled either.
Charlotte: Leslie, I know.
Leslie: You do?
Charlotte: Why do you think I had Paul show up here with me? I have a bad reputation that follows me everywhere. All the tabloids say I’m a diva. Everyone says I'm a nightmare. I’m a perfectionist, but I’m not that hard to work with. But it haunts me on every new set. I knew that you guys would have the same impression of me.
Diane: I want it on the record that I was happy to have you around. I love to meet new friends!
Sam: Excuse her, she’s extremely lonely.
Leslie: We’re happy you’re here now, though!
Charlotte: I can sense that. And I appreciate the honesty. Now, what’s this about me giving basic critiques to all the bakers about their crème brûlées? I’ve seen every episode of this show, most twice. I think I’m ready to give out some actual criticism.
Leslie: Well, if the bakers would get here some time this century, maybe you could prove it to us.
Garry: Frances, too. We can’t do the show without her.
Paul: Sure you can. If she’s not back when the bakers get here, we’re doing the show without her. We already have her replacement.
Leslie: No. None of our on-air personalities have ever missed a show and that doesn’t start today. This is my show.
Paul: Your show that’s going to run significantly over budget because we’re wasting a solid ninety minutes waiting here doing nothing and we have to pay the crew for every minute of that.
Leslie: Paul, with all do respect, that’s a load of crap. My crew is one of the hardest working in the business and just because we, the high-paid multi-millionaires, aren’t doing anything doesn’t mean that these hard-working folks aren’t. They deserve to be paid for every second that they’re here, because they’re always doing something to keep this show moving. And besides, what are you going to do if your number one show goes over budget one time? Cancel us? Go ahead and try.
Paul: Geez, Leslie. Relax.
Leslie: Paul, don’t sass me today. I’ve had a very stressful day. It would be nice if you could maybe, just maybe, take a chill pill and maybe even stop supervising my production since I’m able to run it without you any other day.
Paul: Alright, I’ll go. However, I’d advise you to treat the president of your network a bit better. It might help you out down the road when your show isn’t quite as hot and you need some help.
Leslie: Bye Paul, have a nice day.
Paul leaves and then, ten minutes later, the bakers arrive.
Kenny (the shuttle driver): Traffic cleared up much faster than anticipated! Hope the delay wasn’t too disruptive.
Leslie: No, not at all. Thanks for getting here as quick as possible, Kenny. Bakers, we’re going to start momentarily. You can all go to the green room and wait a few minutes. We’re running a bit beyond schedule.
Kenny: See you later, Leslie. Around five okay to pick them up?
Leslie: Don’t count on it. I’ll give you a call when we’re ready.
Kenny: Sounds good!
Diane: Leslie!
Leslie: WHAT?
Diane: Frances is back.
Leslie: Frances! I’m so glad to have you back!
Frances: I’m back because I’m a professional and I saw the shuttle pull in.
Leslie: Frances, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have been mean to you. Of course I wouldn’t fire you, even if I could. We’re a family. All of us. And Charlotte helped me realize that. Give her a chance.
Frances: I appreciate that. I overreacted, too. And Charlotte, I really need to apologize to you as well. I’ve been in such a bad mood because I didn’t want someone unqualified on the show, but I see now that I was snobbish of me to think you couldn’t be on the show just because you’re not a baker. This show is supposed to brings everybody together and I haven’t been acting like that.
Charlotte: It’s fine. I know I don’t have the best reputation around and I know that I’m not traditionally qualified to be on this show. But I’m going to do my best.
Diane: Hey, I’m anticipating a heartfelt apology to me as well, Leslie.
Sam: Diane. Shut up.
Leslie: So, are we all ready to start the show?
Frances: Yes, I think we are.
Leslie: Then let’s tell the bakers.
Sam: Thank god. Today has been exhausting.
Four hours later, production wraps for the day.
Diane: And that’s a wrap on the first day of custard week!
Sam: We’ll see you tomorrow for the Grand Bake, everybody!
Leslie: Great show today, guys. Charlotte, you’re a natural!
Charlotte: Thank you. Did I say “that crème brûlée was delicious” at all?
Leslie: Once. But who’s counting?
Frances: I was. And I was impressed.
Leslie: Charlotte, you seriously don’t know how much of a compliment that is.What did you think of the conclusion of episode four of Bake Your Heart Out? Let us know in the comments and make sure to join us on Thursday for the Christmas special!
