Marietta Season 6 Episode 4 - The Sherapovas & the Madams Landfield

Marietta Season 6, Episode 4
The Sherapovas & the Madams Landfield

Marietta is in her office on the phone with Milton.

Marietta: So, what crazy nonsense is going on up there?

Milton: Same old, same old. Down there?

Marietta: Everyone is still unbearable all the time about everything.

Milton: So, no changes.

Marietta: Not true, I met with the council of grocers yesterday! Didn’t know that existed, wish I still didn’t.

Milton: At least you didn’t have to meet with the vice president yesterday to discuss… I don’t even know what, I tuned her out.

Marietta: That’s what we all do when we meet her, no?

Milton: I think she’s still bitter she’s never been able to break a tie vote. That’s, like, her only responsibility.

Marietta: Dede’s just bitter in general. It makes sense, I’d be bitter too if everyone hated me and I had no chance of ever actually being president.

Milton: Aww, that’s harsh. The President could die and she could get to serve out his term before she goes.

Marietta: That’s true. Can’t underestimate his ability to stumble off into traffic or something.

Milton: He’s not that stupid. I mean, he did pick a vice president that ensures no one will ever try to assassinate him, at risk of her getting the job and freaking torturing us.

Marietta: Good point. No one’s taking that shot at her knowing she’s the one that’d be here to pick up the pieces.

There is a knock on the door.

Marietta: Ah., Milton. I got company. Gimme a second.

Kate: Milton! Time to vote!

Milton: Yeah, I gotta go, too. We didn’t have much to say, anyway. It was all more of the same.

Ellie: And bring that can of peanuts with, it’s gonna be a long vote.

Marietta: You guys are allowed snacks now? Tammy never let us have snacks!

Milton: Well, Kate’s more fun!

Kate: Don’t know the context of that, but it is true!

Milton: Talk later, bye!

Marietta hangs up as her door swings open.

Marietta: Hey, what’s going on? Who is that?

Tammy: We have a situation.

Marietta: Who died?

Amy: You always think that.

Marietta: Well, it’s the logical jumping point.

Henrietta: My mother is here.

Tammy: And she’s not happy.

Marietta: No one in this office ever is. It’s like Festivus in here, everyone’s just airing their grievances 24/7.

Henrietta: I actually don’t know what this is about, she just said she needed to talk to you, and she seemed to be crying.

Marietta: Baton Rouge is rough. There are, what, eight other Democrats in the senate with her? Yikes.

Henrietta: Eleven.

Marietta: Ah, so a basketball team-sized Democratic caucus rather than a baseball team. That’s comforting. Our state’s in good hands.

Amy: Marietta! She really wants in, can I let her in?

Marietta: My god, what is the urgency?

Amy: I don’t know, but she’s crying! 

Marietta: All right, girls, give me a minute here.

Tammy: Will do.

Moira: Hey, Mar-

Amy: You will wait.

Moira: Excuse me? I j-

Amy: I said you’ll wait!

Eliza walks into Marietta’s office.

Marietta: I’m sorry for all that chaos. I’m very popular this afternoon, apparently. What’s going on? You need a tissue?

Eliza: I could use one, yeah.

Marietta: Here ya go. Cry as long as you want. Whenever you’re ready to talk, just let me know.

Eliza: I’m good, I’m good.

Marietta: Ah, good. Crying makes me so uncomfortable. So what’s up? First off, are you okay?

Eliza: I’ll be okay.

Marietta: Nothing health-wise?

Eliza: Oh, no.

Marietta: That’s a relief. As long as you’re physically healthy, I’m good. I can help you through anything else.

Eliza: That’s sweet.

Marietta: People don’t call me that too often, actually.

Eliza: You’re here for me. That’s more than I can say about my own wife.

Marietta: What did Elena do? Mind you, I’m divorced, so I might not b e the best to get advice from here. My mother, or my best friends, or your daughter, or my sister-in-law… they’re all probably better options, and most of them are just one wall away. God, I’m so lonely.

Eliza: I’m gonna be, too, soon.

Marietta: Oh, no! Are you getting divorced?

Eliza: I don’t think so, but… I wish she believed in me.

Marietta: What do you mean?

Eliza: She wants me to leave the state senate. She says it takes up too much of my time, that I obsess about work when I’m at home.

Marietta: Okay, this is a topic I have plenty of experience with, unfortunately!

Eliza: How did you solve it? You were married a long time.

Marietta: Back when I was early in my US House career, Danny was not happy about how much time I spent at work away from the family. I made it clear to Danny that he was very important to me, that he was always going to be more important than my job, but at the same time, I had to be independent, my own person. I loved him, but I’m not giving up myself for him.

Eliza: He took that well?

Marietta: It made him realize that he had to let me be my own person in order to be with me. And him telling me made me realize I had to make some concessions, too. I had to make an effort to put time aside just for the two of us. Marriage is a two-person job, and the most important thing about it is respect.

Eliza: Is that why you divorced him? You didn’t respect him?

Marietta: Don’t go there, Tears of a Clown!

Eliza: I’m kidding! I appreciate the advice, though. I feel so disrespected, it’s hard to get past that.

Marietta: I understand that. When a spouse demands something of you, it’s hard to just move past that.

Eliza: That’s the main reason I’m here, actually.

Marietta: I figured.

Eliza: I wanted to ask you if I could stay at your place tonight. I stormed out in semi-dramatic fashion with a suitcase.

Marietta: Oh! That’s… it’s that bad?

Eliza: There was a shouting match. I said I can’t be with someone who can’t respect my agency.

Marietta: Oh boy.

Eliza: So, can I -

Marietta: Of course. It’s just Sarah and me in that big house, you stay as long as you want.

Eliza: Thank you. It won’t be long, I know we’ll get through this. I just need a bit of space.

Marietta: I know that feeling. I respect it. I wish I’d had that foresight during some of Danny and my’s biggest fights. Instead, we just screamed at each other until one of us moved to the couch and then we tried to patch things up in the morning.

Eliza: “Never go to bed angry” is so much easier said than done!

Marietta: Exactly! I always told myself that, and then I got married… sometimes you just need an angry night’s sleep. That doesn’t mean you’re not in love, it just means you’re human!

Eliza: I think our sleepover’s gonna be fun.

Marietta: We can watch Dancing with the Stars together! Isn’t that great?

Eliza: I love Dancing with the Stars!

Marietta: Oh, I’m excited!

Meanwhile, at Patty Lynn and Martin’s…

Kathleen: Doorbell!

Patty Lynn: Do you not have legs?

Kathleen I’m making lunch!

Patty Lynn: So am I!

Kathleen: We all know I’m in charge here.

Martin: Don’t worry, I’ll get it!

Martin opens the front door.

Martin: Oh, Elena! What a nice surprise, come on in! Patty Lynn, we have company!

Patty Lynn: Well, since you’re in charge anyway, I’ll leave you to finish lunch while I greet our mystery guest.

Kathleen: Why are you talking like the host of a Food Network show? Just go!

Elena: Hi, guys!

Martin: You look upset.

Patty Lynn: Elena! What’s going on? Did something happen to my dear Eliza?

Elena: We’re just in a fight.

Patty Lynn: What did you do?

Kathleen: I hear hostility! I’m on my way!

Elena: I’m actually here to talk to Kathleen.

Patty Lynn: Oh? Really?

Elena: Well, you as well. I just think, you know… Kathleen’s got more experience in this department.

Patty Lynn: She’s got two more divorces than I do, yes.

Kathleen: And I’m damn proud of them.

Elena: That’s what I mean! My marriage is on the rocks, I think she can help me steer it away!

Patty Lynn: Again… two divorces.

Kathleen: The woman wants my help, you just have to accept that.

Elena: I want help from anyone willing to give it. I don’t want to get divorced like Kathleen.

Kathleen: You know, I do have other characteristics.

Martin: Elena, what happened, exactly?

Elena: I tried to boss her around, she didn’t like that one bit.

Martin: From my experience, wives rarely do.

Patty Lynn: Make no mistake, Elena, I run this show. He might’ve been the mayor, the governor, the Secretary of Education, the UN Ambassador… mama still runs the show.

Martin: And you’ve never let forget that.

Elena: I told Eliza it would be best if she didn’t run for re-election.

Patty Lynn: Oh no!

Kathleen: Why on earth would you EVER suggest that?

Elena: It was stupid!

Kathleen: Yeah!

Elena: I’m just used to us having more time together. Ever since she joined the state senate, I feel very lonely.

Kathleen: My husband got very jealous when I ran for House in the seventies. Would you like to guess how that ended?

Elena: Divorce?

Kathleen: No, he was the one. I knew he was. I did everything I could to make it work, and it did. You have to do the same.

Patty Lynn: Martin and I never had friction over his job, but he always made a point to strike a balance in home life and work. I was always included in whatever he was doing, even when he wasn’t home. Maybe bring that up to Eliza.

Elena: I tried, she didn’t want to listen.

Patty Lynn: Love is messy, sometimes you fight. Give her time, she’ll calm down.

Elena: She packed her things and left.

Kathleen: Oh, that’s not good.

Elena: I know!

Kathleen: What did you say to cause that?

Elena: Demanding she retires was really all that did it, it just devolved into a screaming match from then on.

Patty Lynn: Kiddo… don’t ever tell a politician to hang it up. They need power like they need air to breathe. Trust me, I was one.

Kathleen: Yeah, you’re in the wrong family if you were expecting us to see your side of this.

Elena: I know I was stupid.

Kathleen: You better!

Elena: How do I fix this?

Kathleen: “Hello, dearest love of my life, remember what I told you? Forget that! Live your life, live your dream! I’ll suck it up! Please forgive me!”

Patty Lynn: Don’t sound so desperate. You don’t want to be a pick-me. That’s the term Sarah uses, anyway.

Kathleen: I don’t think that’s really what that means.

Patty Lynn: No, it is. I know the lingo.

Kathleen: Of course you know Lingo, it’s a show for people above the age of seventy.

Martin: Can I give advice here?

Elena: Of course!

Martin: Give her space. Let the anger subside a bit, clearly she thinks that’s what she needs. Then, tomorrow, you give her a call and you meet up and talk it out. I promise you, you’ll realize you care too much about each other to let this cause any sort of permanent rift.

Patty Lynn: What he said.

The next day, Marietta is on the phone with Patty Lynn…

Marietta: So, she’s still here.

Patty Lynn: Still? You gotta leave for work in a couple minutes, I really thought she’d be through this by now. Or at least, you know, at work.

Marietta: She’s still in bed, mom! She’s really taking this hard.

Patty Lynn: I don’t want to meddle, but -

Sarah: Aunt Marietta, isn’t it time for you to get to work?

Marietta: Did you need to interrupt my phone call for that?

Sarah: I’m just trying to be helpful!

Marietta: What are you even doing up? You don’t have anywhere to be!

Sarah: Eliza snores.

Marietta: She’s across the hallway!

Sarah: Exactly. She’s gotta go.

Marietta: What were you saying again, mom, about meddling?

Patty Lynn: I didn’t want to, but…

Marietta: Yeah, I need her outta here. They can’t keep fighting like this.

Patty Lynn: I’ll try and get Elena to agree to meet with her, they can talk this out.

Marietta: We should be marriage counselors.

Patty Lynn: One snag, though… how are we getting in your place?

Sarah: I’ll let you in! I love love.

Patty Lynn: Okay, I’ll be over with her shortly!

Marietta: And I won’t be here! God bless.

One hour later…

Eliza: What are you doing here?

Elena: I was told we were meeting Marietta.

Sarah: Surprise!

Patty Lynn: I’m gonna lock the door.

Elena: I’m not gonna run away.

Eliza: I might!

Kathleen: You won’t.

Elena: I should’ve known you weren’t bringing Kathleen to lunch but not Martin.

Kathleen: The hell does that mean?

Patty Lynn: We go on vacation together one week a yea, and that’s really our limit for each other. Everyone knows this.

Kathleen: You love me.

Sarah: This is not the love we should be talking about right now, though!

Elena: Eliza, I’m really sorry.

Eliza: You better be.

Elena: Don’t be so hostile, I do want to talk.

Eliza: You tried to boss me around! You tried to dictate my future! If my own wife can’t be supportive, who can I count on?

Elena: I know. I’m glad you’re in the fight. It was stupid of me to say you shouldn’t run again, and even dumber to demand you pick me over your job. I want you to do what you want. I can accept that you’re around less if it means you’re doing something you love. 

Eliza: That’s all I need to hear, a bit of support. And, I have to accommodate you, too. I have to make an effort to be there for you.

Sarah: Thank god we’re through that!

Patty Lynn: Honey, this isn’t The Bachelor, we don’t need narration.

Sarah: The most SHOCKING fight ever!

Patty Lynn: Seriously, cut it out.

Sarah: Sorry.

Eliza: I’m ready to come home now. I’ve missed you.

Elena: Oh, good. The bed felt so empty without you and you many pillows and blankets.

Eliza: What can I say, I get cold.

Sarah: Is that why you snore so much?

Eliza: Excuse me?

Elena: The hell did you just say about my wife?

Patty Lynn: Ignore her! She’s just young and naive. And stupid.

Eliza: Ah, let’s go home.

What did you think of this episode of Marietta? Let us know in the comments and make sure to read the new episode next week!

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