Marietta Season 2, Episode 21
Party Like It's 1996
The year is 1996. Marietta is running for the US Senate in a special election.
Tammy: Representative Landfield, I’m so glad you called me back! There’s only a week until the big day!
Marietta: Trust me Tammy, I know. And please, call me Marietta. We’re going to be colleagues in a week.
Tammy: That is the hope, isn’t it?
Marietta: I’ve seen the polls, Tammy. I know I’m ahead. Besides, it’s Louisiana. We haven’t elected a Republican to the Senate since 1876!
Tammy: Ahh, I know. I served with him in the Senate.
Marietta: Oh, you’re not that old.
Tammy: You think I’m old?
Marietta: No, Madam First Lady!
Tammy: Don’t worry! I’m only joking. I know I'm old. Anyway, my husband is the president right now and usually special elections don’t turn out too well for the incumbent president’s party, so be careful. Keep fighting.
Marietta: I will, don’t worry. I’m not losing the Democrats a seat in the Senate.
Tammy: Good. We lost the majority in the midterm, we can’t lose any other seats. Certainly not in Louisiana. We could run a damn boot there and still win. The boot would be better than Dukakis, I think.
Marietta: Are you seeing something I’m not? You sound worried.
Tammy: Just one worrying poll. There’s nothing for you to fret about.
Marietta: One worrying poll? Why was I not told about this?
Tammy: I think that might be a problem to take up with your campaign manager. Who is that? I know your dad was the last time you ran but now he’s in DC. serving as Secretary of Transportation.
Marietta: My mom. That’s why I didn’t know.
Tammy: Are you saying your mom’s not a good campaign manager?
Marietta: No, she’s great. She just thinks I’m a child and she tries to hide bad news from me.
Tammy: Oh. Well, it’s not that bad. One poll just had you tied with Franidau.
Marietta: That’s not great. I need to campaign harder in this last week.
Tammy: Do you want the DSCC to send you some more money? It’s an election year so we have a lot of places to spread the money between but this is a key race and I like you so I can throw some cash your way.
Marietta: That sounds like a plan. I hate to put you in an awkward position -
Tammy: I’m the First Lady and a high-ranking US Senator, I’m used to being in awkward positions. Mitch nominated like five people for his cabinet that I hated but I had to vote for them anyway because the media would go crazy.
Marietta: Would it be possible for the president to come down and campaign for me? He’s very popular down here, he has that southern charm. I think it could help me.
Tammy: Mitch is very busy, but I think he can make it work.
Marietta: Could you come down to campaign, too? You’re the coolest Senator, everyone loves you. You’re the First Lady!
Tammy: No, John Glenn is the coolest Senator. As you keep reminding me, I’m the First Lady, and even I’m starstruck around him. The guy is an astronaut.
Marietta: Well, can Senator Glenn come down here then?
Tammy: No, he’s too busy doing cool things. You’ll have to settle for little ole’ me.
Marietta: Okay, I’m having an Election Eve rally in New Orleans on Monday. Sound good?
Tammy: I’ll be there with bells on!
At Martin and Patty Lynn’s…
Marietta: Milton! What are you doing here? You should be in Baton Rouge!
Milton: You should be in DC.
Marietta: Point taken. Seriously though, I am surprised to see you here.
Patty Lynn: I asked him to come help me canvass for you! Having a state representative and a city councilor out here campaigning for you can’t hurt.
Marietta: I heard about the poll, mom.
Patty Lynn: What poll? No polls came out lately. Just that one last week that had you leading by five.
Marietta: Tammy Yarborough told me about it.
Patty Lynn: The First Lady did not tell you about any poll, that I am certain of.
Marietta: Greg and I are tied?
Patty Lynn: Nope. Didn’t happen.
Marietta: I can be told bad poll results without freaking out. I’m a US Representative. I’m a mother. I’m not a child.
Patty Lynn: Fine, I won’t try and protect you anymore.
Marietta: That’s not what I’m asking. Mom, if you don’t tell me the bad and make me think I’m way ahead, I won’t fight as hard for votes and I could lose. You’d hurt me. Dad told me the good and the bad and I won every race.
Patty Lynn: The race isn’t that competitive. It’s a bad poll.
Marietta: After my phone call with Senator Yarborough, I picked up a newspaper at the news stand. The headline was “Dead heat in LA Senate race.”
Patty Lynn: Maybe they meant Los Angeles.
Marietta: Oh yes, how could I forget about Los Angeles’ recent admission to the union as our fifty-first state?
Patty Lynn: Okay, okay. The race is tighter than I’ve let on. We’re still winning this thing.
Marietta: Finally, some truth. Unlike that time I suggested “Marietta Landfield: Wife. Mother. Fighter.” as my campaign slogan and you say you loved it and then wouldn’t use it because you actually hated it.
Patty Lynn: That was a misstep. I guess that’s all I do.
Marietta: Hiring you wasn’t a misstep, but you do need to improve in a few areas. Don’t worry, I’m going to win and give you a chance to get better.
Patty Lynn: There’s the spirit!
Milton: So, uh, mom? Are we going canvassing? I’m taking time out of my busy schedule to be here.
Marietta: What, are they having Taco Tuesday at the capitol or something?
Milton: Maybe.
Marietta: They are.
Patty Lynn: I guess we can go. Marietta, are you coming?
Marietta: No, I have a campaign event in Baton Rouge in three hours and one in Shreveport tomorrow afternoon. I have to get back to my house and throw an overnight bag together since I’m staying overnight.
Patty Lynn: You’re staying overnight in Shreveport? My darling daughter, don’t do that to yourself.
Marietta: I’ll do whatever to win. Even stay there. If I can stay in DC, I can stay anywhere. Shreveport might not have the jazz clubs or the booze in the streets that New Orleans has, but at least you don’t feel like everyone’s about to stab you in the back.
The next day…
Marietta: Hi mom!
Patty Lynn: Marietta! Where are you?
Marietta: I’m in Opelousas.
Patty Lynn: What are you doing there? Also, where’s that?
Marietta: It’s on the drive home from Shreveport. I had a flat tire and had to find a place to pull over. This place is a little scary because I’ve been here fifteen minutes and I haven’t seen anybody at this gas station. I’m surprised the payphone even works.
Patty Lynn: Just get out of there.
Marietta: I will. I just thought I’d let you know I’m going to be late. I know you wanted to go canvassing today again.
Patty Lynn: That’s fine. Your father and your Aunt Kathleen both flew in today to help out.
Marietta: Do you think we’re making a mistake mostly centering the campaign on New Orleans? I think we’ve already got that vote in the bag.
Patty Lynn: I think it’s a good strategy. That’s Landfield territory!
Marietta: Technically all of Louisiana is Landfield territory. Dad won the governorship twice. Grandma won once. Grandpa won twice and won four terms in the US Senate. It’s not like none of them campaigned anywhere else. I’m jut worried I could be painted as New Orleans liberal elite who barely ever tried to reach out to other parts of the state. I mean, I’ve had. a combined ten campaign events in the rest of the state and like a hundred in New Orleans since December. And one of those events outside of New Orleans was during the Friends episode where Ross and Rachel went on their first date so nobody went to it anyway.
Patty Lynn: Don’t worry. It’ll all be alright. Your father’s going to campaign in Baton Rouge and Kathleen is going up north to canvass with some of your volunteers.
Marietta: They are? Why didn’t you tell me that before I freaked out? I thought you said they flew in today.
Patty Lynn: Yes, flew into Louisiana. I’m not as incompetent as you think. I personally may not be willing to leave New Orleans but everyone else did. Milton went all the way to Metairie. Do you know how hard that is for him?
Marietta: He likes Ellen, I don’t think it’s that hard for him.
Patty Lynn: Just trust me, dear girl. I’m going to turn this tied race
Marietta: Tied race? Was there another poll I wasn’t told about or something?
Patty Lynn: Don’t pay it any mind!
Marietta: Oh lord. Well, I better get home quick. I got my outfit dirtier than all get-out when I was changing the tire but I guess I can change. I think I’ll be home in two hours.
The next day, after Marietta’s interview with the local newspaper…
Marietta: Oh my god, mom. That was horrible!
Patty Lynn: Come on, it wasn’t that bad. I thought you did well!
Marietta: They asked me why I wanted to be a Senator and I started with “I don’t know.”
Patty Lynn: You fixed that though.
Marietta: By talking about how my parents and aunt and uncle and grandparents were all politicians? Nepotism much?
Patty Lynn: I’ve not doubt you’d be just as successful in politics if you weren’t a Landfield. You are inspiring!
Marietta: You’re my mother, of course you’d say that.
Kathleen: I think so too!
Marietta: Aunt Kathleen! You’re really here?
Patty Lynn: I told you she was in Louisiana!
Marietta: You never know if you’re making it up.
Patty Lynn: I’ve been on the city council for ten years and I’ve heard some very nasty things. Never have I ever been disrespected like today.
Kathleen: Stop it, you two. I haven’t been down to Louisiana from Hartford in a year but I’m here to help you, Marietta. I don’t need to hear bickering while I’m here.
Marietta: Sorry Kathleen.
Kathleen: I’m never moving back here either so let’s enjoy the few days I’m here. It’s far too humid.
Patty Lynn: Yes, you had to go all New England on us.
Kathleen: It’s nice there!
Patty Lynn: If you think Dunkin’ Donuts is fine cuisine, that is.
Kathleen: We have lobster and clam chowder and all kinds of actual fine cuisine there. Don’t make this about food, I’ll win.
Patty Lynn: Crawfish and gumbo. Checkmate.
Martin: You both have delicious crustaceans and soup where you live, cut it out. We’re having a family fun day while Marietta has her rally in Baton Rouge.
Marietta: Oh my god, I forgot about that.
Martin: At this point, most fathers would questions if their daughter really was qualified to be a Senator if she can’t even remember she has a rally that night. Not me! Scatterbrained isn’t the worst quality for a Senator to have. Trust me, I know a lot of them.
Marietta: Aww dad, you’re too sweet.
Kathleen: Hey Marietta, you’re a mom now.
Marietta: Yeah. I should probably go home and help Danny with Kyle one of these days but I guess that day isn’t today.
Kathleen: Bring your kid out at a rally. When a young lady with a family is running for office, she has to remind voters that she loves her family very much and isn’t abandoning them. I did it and look where I wound up.
Patty Lynn: A former US Representative from Arkansas?
Kathleen: A former, four-term US Representative who served as the Chair of the House Agriculture Committee before Reagan came in and pushed me out of office.
Patty Lynn: Was is Reagan or was it the fact that you were only living in Arkansas for two years before you ran?
Kathleen: They didn’t care about that the first four times I ran.
Marietta: I’m sure you guys are gonna have a ton of fun tonight, you’re getting along so well! Aunt Kathleen, I’ll keep your suggestion in mind.
Kathleen: Ha! See, I have good suggestions!
Patty Lynn: I never said you didn’t.
Marietta: Goodbye!
On Election Eve, at the airport…
Tammy: Hello Marietta!
Marietta: Madam First Lady! Where is the president?
Tammy: Mitch is running late. He’ll be here soon
Marietta: How’s he gonna get here? You took Air Force One!
Tammy: I’m gonna tell you a secret. There’s more than one Air Force One.
Marietta: Really?
Tammy: Yep. Don’t tell anyone!
Three hours later, at Marietta’s final pre-election campaign rally…
Tammy: I’m so glad that you’ve all shown up to welcome the Yarboroughs to New Orleans! It’s not every day that I’m here so it’s lovely to get such a warm welcome. However, I’m not just here for any old reason. I love to be here but I’m on a mission. I want to spread the word out about Marietta Landfield’s campaign for the US Senate. I’ve gotten to know Representative Landfield very well over the past months and I’ll tell you, you have a great fighter here. There is perhaps no better choice for this job. I’ve been in the Senate for a long time. A long, long, loooooooong time. I know when a politician has that spark of passion and determination that they need to succeed, and she has that. She will help pass my husband’s agenda better than anyone. I was also lucky to have served alongside Marcus Hoovier in the US Senate. Representative Landfield shares so many wonderful qualities with him that truly draw you to them. I would be so honored to serve alongside her, and I think it would be a great honor for you all to be represented by her in the Senate. Now, since I’ve been talking for long enough and also because I’d like to get home in time to watch Murphy Brown, I’ll turn this over to the next Senator from Louisiana, Marietta Landfield!
On Election Day, as the poll results are beginning to be reported…
Marietta: This could be a long night, guys. It might not even turn out the way we anticipate. Apparently the polls are close.
Martin: You mother seems confident.
Patty Lynn: This is happening for you, I know it.
Marietta: just don’t get your hopes up. I’ve written an acceptance speech and a concession speech for a reason.
Kathleen: I don’t think anything going to top your speech from last night, that was really great. Very inspiring stuff!
Marietta: I’m planning to bring Kyle out for this one!
Kathleen: Finally taking my suggestion. I hope it’s not too late!
Tom Harner (news anchor): We have results from that heavily-watched special election to the US Senate in Louisiana. In an unexpected blowout…
Patty Lynn: You did it!
Marietta: Just wait.
Tom: NBC can report that Marietta Landfield, the Democratic congresswoman, will win that election and hold onto it for her party. She is expected to win a double-digit victory following an acclaimed speech last night in New Orleans and publicized appearances by the President and First Lady.
Marietta: Okay, now you can celebrate…
Milton: Congratulations! Maybe I can run for your House seat now!
Marietta: You don’t need to follow me into every office, you know!
Patty Lynn: Someone help me, I can’t breathe! My baby’s gonna be in the Senate!
What did you think of the episode? Comment your thoughts, listen to the official season two playlist, vote in the poll below, and make sure to read the season finale next week!
