The Bullpen Season 1 Episode 11: The Job Interview (Season Finale)

Kurt: long-term reliever 
Lorenzo: middle relief pitcher
Jason: left-handed specialist
Robert: 8th inning pitcher/setup man
Bryan: closer
Eli: various relief positions
Garry: Bullpen coach

*Setting: Offseason practice.*
Jason: OK it’s been an hour and Garry still isn’t here to tell us what to do. Has anyone heard from him? What would he want us to do?
Robert: 10 jumping jacks!
Jason: You’re actually probably right about that. 
Bryan: Do you think he even cares anymore? He’s barely showed up the entire week.
Eli: True, he keeps talking like we’re terrible pitchers but—
Kurt: We are terrible pitchers, Eli.
Eli: Maybe if we practice hard enough though we could become better.
Kurt: It doesn’t even matter, they’re very set about not bringing us into the games.
Lorenzo: I’m with them on that one. 
Bryan: Seriously, he doesn’t even have us pitching from the mound, he says the groundskeepers don’t want to have to bother fixing it after. 
Kurt: That and the fact he wants us to be able to reach the plate.
Robert: With enough practice maybe we could do that from the mound.
Bryan: I have heard that this is his style on purpose. He wants us to think we’re bad and wants to make sure we don’t get any better and start demanding to get put into the games. I think it’s time we try to get that to change.
Eli: Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed.
Lorenzo: That’s not true, I didn’t sleep last night.
Eli: Talking about Bryan, not everything is about you Lorenzo.
Lorenzo: Jerk.
Kurt: OK look at this everyone, we’re gossiping about Garry, picking on Lorenzo, what’s happened to us all? Aren’t we a team?
Jason: Technically Kurt does have a point. 
Kurt: And what do teams do?
Jason: Practice.
Kurt: And is that what we really want right now?
Lorenzo: I say we don’t. We have time before spring training.
Robert: Yes, but remember we’re used a lot in spring training. Especially when our starting pitchers are asked to take batting practice.
Bryan: They’re really good hitters too.
Robert: No Bryan, we’re really bad pitchers.
Jason: We don’t have to be really bad pitchers though. Not if we try hard enough. Come on guys, let’s practice.
Lorenzo: OK Coach Jason. Let’s practice throwing the ball around the diamond.
Jason: Except we’re not infielders.
Lorenzo: Who’s stopping us from pretending?
Jason: Alright everyone, grab a position and start throwing the ball around.
Kurt: You’re just going to stand there and watch?
Jason: Of course! I didn’t make myself coach for nothing.
(Garry enters)
Garry: Hey everyone. I’m sure you’ve all been wondering about where I’ve been.
Bryan: Kind of, yeah.
Garry: Well remember how you all went through scenarios where you got traded? I went home that night and thought of something. Maybe it’s time I step back.
Kurt: That’s my joke Coach.
Garry: This isn’t a joke Kurt. In fact, I’ve been interviewing with some guys at another team.
Eli: You really think another team would take you?
Garry: I wasn’t sure. But they seemed to like me. They’re giving me a title upgrade too.
Robert: Wait...are you leaving?
Garry: Yes. I’ve taken the role of a pitching coach at another team. I signed the contract. Yesterday was my last day as your bullpen coach.
Robert: Who’s going to be our coach then?
Garry: Don’t know don’t care. The team will probably hire someone outside of the club who’s desperate enough.
Jason: Do they have to though? I kind of liked my stint as coach.
Eli: The one you gave yourself for about a minute and didn’t even say much about what we should all do?
Jason: It’s called my coaching style, everyone has one.
Garry: You really want to do this Jason?
Jason: You know what...yeah, I do. I’m going to tell them I’m retiring and apply for bullpen coach.
Garry: You probably have the job then.
Eli: If Jason’s retiring can I get his position? I’d love a real title.
Garry: Do you pitch left—actually I shouldn’t care?
Eli: No worse than I pitch right-handed. I can practice a little bit and do it.
Jason: As my first request as basically coach, I’m moving Eli to the left-handed specialist spot.
Lorenzo: We really will have a great season in the summer, won’t we?

Eli: Sure Lorenzo. Sure.

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