Gretchen: Anthony, have you seen my mom today?
Anthony: I try not to see your mom as much as I can.
Gretchen: It’s unusual for her to not be up first, isn’t it?
Anthony: I think so, yeah. She’s usually the first thing I see in the morning, I always have to wonder if I died in my sleep and went to hell
Gretchen: Come on, you gotta admit that you wouldn’t know what to do without her.
Anthony: Do I?
Gretchen: She usually makes our coffee. I’m still waiting now.
Anthony: I’ll get the coffee started.
Gretchen: Should I go check on her? I don’t think this is normal for her.
Anthony: My god, don’t wake the sleeping beast when we’re finally getting a break from it!
Gretchen: Can you be serious for a second? I’m worried about her.
Anthony: You don’t have to be. She’s probably just got a headache or something. Everyone oversleeps from time to time!
Gretchen: Not my mother!
Anthony: All right, if you’re gonna keep going on about her, you might as well check on her.
Gretchen: All right, I’ll be right back.
Anthony: I’ll be here, mourning the loss of my peace and quiet.
Toby: Dad, where’s grandma?
Anthony: Is she the only thing you guys can talk about? It’s not that big of a deal that she’s not up yet, she’s fine.
Gretchen: Anthony! Can you come here?
Anthony: What’s wrong?
Gretchen: Just come here, please.
Anthony: Toby, do you need me to get your breakfast before I tend to this? I’m sort of dreading it.
Toby: No, I can get it.
Anthony: Of course, I have the one teenager on earth who doesn’t jump at the chance to have their breakfast made for them while they vegetate on the couch. Coming, dear!
Anthony walks up the stairs.
Anthony: What’s going on?
Gretchen: I couldn’t wake her up.
Anthony: She’s probably just really tired.
Gretchen: I don’t, um, I don’t feel a pulse.
Anthony: What?
Gretchen: I’m not a nurse, but I don’t feel a pulse. I think she’s gone, Anthony.
Anthony: Oh my god, I was awful to her.
Gretchen: What do I do?
Anthony: I think you just call 9-1-1.
Gretchen: How do I tell Toby? We can’t exactly hide it.
Anthony: I can tell him. You just, uh, do what you have to. I’m here for you.
Toby: Dad, what’s going on up there?
Anthony: I’ll be right down, buddy.
Gretchen: What are you going to tell him?
Anthony: The truth.
Gretchen: Oh no.
Anthony: Honey, get up. It’s okay.
Gretchen: My mother is dead
Toby: Grandma’s what?
Gretchen: Oh boy… said that too loud.
Anthony: Toby, it’s all right.
Toby: But, grandma!
Anthony: It was peaceful. She went in her sleep.
Toby: You always joked about this, you always gave her a hard time, now you can’t even make it up to her!
Anthony: I never joked about this! I loved your grandmother, we just showed our love for one another in a different way than most.
Toby: You alway said she was immortal because “evil never dies.”
Anthony: Well, I guess I did say that. It wasn’t serious. We had a very playful, joking relationship. It was just hard to tell.
Toby: I need a hug.
Anthony: Bring it in. I know it’s hard.
Gretchen: I called 9-1-1. They’re sending over over, you know, uh… I can’t even think.
Anthony: Paramedics.
Gretchen: Thank you, yeah.
Anthony: Who do we need to call to let them know about this? It’s gonna be on the news.
Gretchen: You think so?
Anthony: Paramedics taking a body bag out of the governor’s house while cops are at the scene is gonna alert the media.
Gretchen: Oh, god. I didn’t even think of that!
Anthony: You don’t need to worry, I can call your brother and sister. And Christina.
Gretchen: No, I have to call them myself. I’m afraid you might accidentally laugh when you say it.
Anthony: I would never! You know I loved your mom, don’t you?
Gretchen: You had a complicated relationship.
Anthony: She drove me crazy when she criticized you, but she was a good person. I’m gonna miss arguing with her. I can hear her voice in my head now, yelling at me for leaving my eggs on the stove. Speaking of, I should go get them before we also burn the house down.
Gretchen: I’m gonna go out on the porch and call Eddie and Mary and Christina while I wait for the first responders.
Anthony: Do you want your coffee?
Gretchen: I’m not thirsty.
Anthony: I get it.
Gretchen picks up the phone and calls Mary.
Mary: Gretchen? Are you getting ready for work?
Gretchen: Mary, I have something to tell you.
Mary: What’s wrong? I hear it in your voice, something happened. Why would you be calling if something wasn’t wrong? I see you at work anyway!
Gretchen: Mary. Just give me a minute.
Mary: Are you crying?
Gretchen: Mary, I don’t know how to say this. I wish it weren’t over the phone.
Mary: No.
Gretchen: Mom passed away.
Mary: No.
Gretchen: I don’t know what else to say.
Mary: Do you want me to come over?
Gretchen: Are you okay to drive?
Mary: I think so.
Gretchen: I’m gonna call Eddie. I’ll see you soon.
Mary: See you soon. I love you.
Gretchen: I love you, too.
Gretchen hangs up.
Gretchen: Well… one down, two to go.
Gretchen picks up the phone and calls Eddie.
Eddie: Gretchen, it’s so early in the morning for you to be calling while I’m enjoying retirement! Someone better be dead.
Gretchen: Um.
Eddie: That “um” sounded very serious.
Gretchen: Eddie, this is not easy to say, but I needed to call you before you found out. Mom passed in her sleep.
Eddie: What? God, no, I was only joking!
Gretchen: I know you were, and I know how odd it is for me to be calling so late. So I get the confusion.
Eddie: I just saw mom town days ago. She was fine! What happened?
Gretchen: I don’t know. My head can’t wrap itself around this yet. She was very healthy for her age. She never lost her spark. I guess that’s a good thing.
Eddie: What are we gonna do?
Gretchen: We’ll stick together like she’d want.
Eddie: I don’t know if that’s the main thing she’d want. She’d want you to focus on being a better governor first.
Gretchen: Do not.
Eddie: I’m trying to infuse some humor, Gretchen.
Gretchen: I admire it, but I’m not in the mood to laugh.
Eddie: I understand.
Gretchen: Hey, Mary’s coming over. I don’t know if you want to or not, but you’re invited to, if you want.
Eddie: I was getting ready to go golfing, but I can’t say I’m in the mood anymore. I’ll be over.
Gretchen: See you then.
Gretchen hangs up, starts crying, and then calls Christina once she collects herself.
Christina: Mom, what’s up? I’m off to my finals exam, I don’t really have time to talk right now.
Gretchen: It’s important, kiddo.
Christina: What is it?
Gretchen: First, I love you.
Christina: Are you sick?
Gretchen: No. I just… thought you needed to hear it. Because it’s never a bad time to tell people we love them.
Christina: Something’s up.
Gretchen: Honey, I’m so sorry to be telling you this, but we lost your grandmother.
Christina: What do you mean lost her? At the mall?
Gretchen: She died, honey.
Christina: No she didn’t.
Gretchen: I know, it’s hard to grasp.
Christina: She called me yesterday. I didn’t pick up, because I was studying.
Gretchen: Oh, honey. Don’t get upset with yourself.
Christina: I ignored the woman who helped raise me to read a book.
Gretchen: You know how proud she was of you seeking an education.
Christina: I repaid that pride and love by ignoring her.
Gretchen: Look, honey, she wouldn’t want you feeling shame. She would only ever want me to feel shame.
Christina: What should I do? I don’t know how to focus on exams right now.
Gretchen: Talk to your professors. See what can be done. If you can, I think it’d be best for you to come home. It would be best for us to all be together. It’s not like we’re that far of a drive from campus.
Christina: I’ll see what I can do.
Gretchen: I love you.
Christina: You said that already. But I love you, too.
Gretchen hangs up.
Anthony: How you feeling?
Gretchen: Those were the three hardest calls I’ve ever had to make in my life.
Anthony: I get that.
A bit later, at the office…
Sarita: She’s late, right?
Carol: Very late.
Sarita: Should we call her?
Carol: I don’t want to be a stalker. I sent a text, like a normal person.
Esther: I could go over to her house.
Carol: Why would we send you there?
Sarita: Also, that sounds far more stalker-esque than simply calling.
Carol: That too.
Sarita: What do we have on the docket today that we can do without her?
Carol: Uh, let me check.
Esther: Look! Look!
Carol: Is there a pretty bird outside or something?
Esther: On my office TV!
Carol: You want us to come to your little office? That’s just a closet we shoved a little school desk and a computer into. I didn’t even realize it had more than one outlet in there.
Esther: Just look!
Carol: “First responders seen at Governor Raymond’s home - cause unknown.”
Esther: Wasn’t it worth looking?
Carol: I’m quite nervous now.
Samantha: Guys, did you see the news? They’re saying online that they were seen wheeling out a body from Gretchen’s house!
Carol: Oh my god.
Sarita: Maybe we reconsider that “no calling” policy.
Carol: I’m gonna call now and get to the bottom of this.
Esther: We could get lucky, maybe some drunkard drowned in her pool! It’s happened to other people!
Carol: I’d bet against that.
Sarita: Although, what a PR nightmare that would be for su.
Samantha: It might make me governor!
Carol: Do we think that’s an appropriate comment right now, Pratt?
Samantha: No, I don’t.
Carol pulls out her phone and calls Gretchen.
Gretchen: Carol, I’m so sorry!
Carol: You’re alive! She’s alive, guys!
Gretchen: Don’t say that word.
Carol: What’s going on? I can tell something’s wrong. I see it on TV.
Gretchen: I guess you need to know so you can prep a statement now that the media’s all over it. My mom died today.
Carol: Oh my god, I am so sorry!
Sarita: What’s wrong?
Carol (mouthing words): Her mom died.
Esther: What was that? Speak up!
Carol: Jesus Christ…
Esther: She’s converted to Christianity? I thought she was already Catholic.
Samantha: Esther, I think we should go.
Esther: But I work here!
Carol: Actually, this hurts my heart to say, we do need her. We have to put a statement out to the press.
Gretchen: Carol, you write it. Please.
Carol: Okay, change of plans! Pratt, take her away!
Samantha: I don’t know what’s going on here, but sure. Esther, let’s go get some coffee.
Esther: I feel like I’m not being looped into everything going on.
Sarita: Watt would ever give you that idea?
Gretchen: My family’s here, so I’m gonna go I won’t be in today. Maybe tomorrow, but we’re making funeral plans. We’re thinking a service on Saturday, you guys are obviously all invited.
Carol: Of course, I get it! Go, be with your family. I’ll take care of everything here. Again, I’m so sorry for your loss. Your mom was quite the character.
Gretchen: That she was.
Later that night…
Gretchen: Honey, I can’t sleep.
Anthony: I think that’s pretty natural. Do you want one of my melatonin pills?
Gretchen: I kinda just want to talk.
Anthony: That’s fine, too.
Gretchen: Mom loved me, right?
Anthony: Oh my gosh, of course!
Gretchen: Everyone was sharing memories about her, and I know I had plenty of good memories. I’m not saying I didn’t. It just felt like, uh… she spent so much of my life being really tough on me. And that’s what’s gonna stick in my head, and that makes me sad.
Anthony: She chose to live with us. She spent almost every waking moment in this house. I never told you this, but one time, I walked in on her writing in a journal. She refused to let me call it a diary. Anyway, she was quick to hide it, but you know how she sometimes talked to herself when she was writing?
Gretchen: Yeah, I guess. I do it, too.
Anthony: She was so proud of you. I could hear her raving about the great things you were doing as governor. This was around when you were picked for VP. She was so thrilled about that.
Gretchen: I wish she’d ever showed it.
Anthony: I think she just kept a lot in. She needed to be tough. She was a tough Italian woman.
Gretchen: That’s one way to put it.
Anthony: I know she and I didn’t appear close, but she did tell me from time to time how grateful she was for you letting her stay with her. She really did mean it.
Gretchen: Why didn’t she ever tell me?
Anthony: God only knows. But I do know that she loved you. She adored you, actually. And she was so glad to have you by her side.
Gretchen: I think her favorite part was butting heads.
Anthony: That’s how she showed her love. That’s how I choose to see it, anyway.
Gretchen: I can’t believe I’ll never get to hear my mother criticize me again or mock me for just being the governor of Rhode Island, as if it’s my fault we’re this small and sparsely-populated.
Anthony: She loved Rhode Island, too! Like I said, it’s how she showed her love!
The next day…
Christina: Mom, what are you reading?
Gretchen: Nothing, honey. Just something your grandmother wrote.
Christina: Grandma wrote something?
Gretchen: Just a diary, er, a journal. I can’t read it without crying, but it’s very sweet.
Christina: That doesn’t sound like grandma.
Gretchen: Oh, I know. She had a tough exterior, but the parts inside were all pure. Mostly pure. I’m gonna miss her.
Christina: I’m gonna miss her, too.
What did you think of the midseason premiere of Raymond Island? Let us know in the comments, and make sure to read the new episode next week!
