Evergreen Aimee Season 2 Episode 4 - Last Dance

Evergreen Aimee Season 2, Episode 4
Last Dance

Aimee is at the airport, waiting for her plane to arrive with some of her colleagues.

Aimee: Everyone, I just wanted to remind you all about my bipartisan campaign fundraiser on Sunday. I invited you all before, but it’s coming up quickly and I want you all there! It’s my last rally before election day and I wanted everyone that’s helped me on this journey to be there.

Margo: I’m flattered, but, uh, don’t most of your voters think that I’m a communist?

Aimee: Not all of them!

Victoria: I don’t! I think you're great!

Margo: Yeah, but you’re only voting for Aimee because she’s your niece.

Victoria: Not true! I’m also very firmly opposed to murder-for-hire.

Carolyn: See, I’m not the only pro-life one here.

Aimee: I’m pro-life!

Carolyn: Are you though?

Aimee: Yes!

Victoria: Girls, stop trying to convince me to vote for Jankler. I already sent in my ballot.

Doug: I’ll be there, Aimee. Anything to get me out of Yakima for the weekend.

Aimee: Don’t you like Yakima?

Doug: Who does?

Victoria: Oh my god, I think I see the Speaker! I’m going to go say hello!

Aimee: I’d better go with to make sure my aunt doesn’t kidnap Speaker Peretti. Don’t get on the plane without me!

Carolyn: The plane doesn’t get here for another half-hour, I think we’ll be good.

Lynette: You never know!

Carolyn: I know.

Lynette: I wish everyone were as wise as you, Carolyn.

Carolyn: If only.

Nanette: Aimee! Is this your aunt you always mention?

Aimee: Sure is!

Victoria: I’m a massive fan! We’ve met before!

Nanette: I meet a lot of people, but I’m quite surprised I don’t remember you. You don’t meet someone who dresses in a leopard print romper and bright red boots every day.

Victoria: I have been called a fashion icon before. I reject the title, but it has been said.

Aimee: By who?

Victoria: My many admirers.

Nanette: Well, it’s been a pleasure catching up, but I’m afraid I have to get to my plane. They’re boarding the flight the San Francisco right now and first class is up now.

Victoria: I wish Aimee let me sit in first class.

Aimee: I can’t afford it! Don’t you want to sit with me?

Victoria: It’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make.

Aimee: Anyway, Nanette. I wanted to thank you for your help. That horrible ad you made where you called me a communist has really helped me. Washington basically sees me as the second coming of FDR and I’ve never been more popular among Democrats. I didn’t know people were so easily swayed.

Nanette: You’re very welcome, Aimee. Anything for a friend.

Victoria: Aww, that’s adorable!

Aimee: Excuse her, she doesn’t have many friends. She doesn’t experience this very often.

Nanette: I’m going to get going, you two have a safe flight home and good luck with your campaign, Aimee. I’ll see you next week.

Victoria: Wait! Do you want to come to Aimee’s campaign event?

Aimee: Aunt Victoria, she can’t! She can’t just risk being seen at the event. That’s why we had to scheme in private about that ad?

Nanette: Thank for understanding. I’d come if I could. I’ll be there in spirit. Instead, I will be at… I’m assuming a Pride event in San Francisco? I’m not sure. Maybe I’ll be in Virginia. I’m not in control of my own schedule.

Aimee: You have fun at whatever you’re going to!

Later that night, when Aimee returns home…

Dave: Finally, you’re home! I’ve missed you!

Aimee: Dave, I know that look. We’re not having sex. Look what happened the last time.

Dave: It’s bringing life into the world!

Aimee: You wouldn’t be saying that with a smile if you had to carry it in your stomach.

Dave: That’s not what I was angling for, anyway.

Aimee: Am I no longer desirable, Dave?

Dave: It’s not that.

Aimee: What is it, then?

Cherie: Aimee, open your eyes!

Aimee: Mom!

Kimmy: You’re a freak, woman. Aunt Victoria is right behind you and that’s what you’re thinking about? Come on.

Aimee: I thought that’s what Dave was thinking about! And what are you guys doing here?

Ernesto: It’s only six o’clock, honey. It’s not like it’s midnight.

Aimee: It feels a lot later.

Ernesto: Well, time zones do exist.

Aimee: I’m so exhausted by this damn campaign, I can’t wait for it to be done.

Cherie: That’s part of why we’re here! We wanted to tell you that we did all the decorating for the big Sunday fundraiser!

Aimee: You did?

Kimmy: We actually can work pretty fast when we know we have a deadline.

Dave: That’s why I looked like that. Not because I wanted to -

Aimee: We don’t have to repeat it, Dave.

Ernesto: We’re also very ready for the campaign to be over with. We’re not used to elections actually having stakes. I’m never this nervous! I get texts whenever new polls come out!

Aimee: I sent you guys messages about every poll that came out when I first ran for House! It was a tossup the entire campaign!

Cherie: That’s different, sweetheart. This campaign actually matters.

Aimee: That one mattered too! This one couldn’t be happening right now if that one didn’t happen.

Cherie: I know, but the stakes were a lot lower. So you lose a tossup district in a blue-leaning year, some normal human we disagree with politically gets to become one of five hundred members of the House for two years. Here, you lose to an attempted murderer and he now gets to control a whole percent of every vote in the Senate for six years! What does that say about you?

Aimee: I think that would say more about Washington than it says about me?

Cherie: If that’s how you want to look at it, sure.

Ernesto: Anyway, what we’re trying to say is that we really want you to win and the stress of it is taking a toll.

Kimmy: I’ve been managing pretty well.

Ernesto: That’s because you’re a Democrat, honey. The only thing you ever worry about is carbon emissions. You certainly don’t worry about being employed…

Kimmy: I’m working on it!

Victoria: You know, my friend Tina lives in a retirement community in Vancouver and they’re always looking for someone to entertain the residents. You have a beautiful voice, you could be their in-house singer.

Kimmy: Being the singer at a retirement home. Isn’t that the premise of a CBS sitcom?

Cherie: I love Blue Bloods!

Ernesto: That’s not what Blue Bloods is about.

Aimee: Why are we talking about Blue Bloods?

Cherie: It’s on tonight, I hope I recorded it!

Aimee: Sometimes, I wonder why I even fly home.

Victoria: We can stay in DC if you want, my bedroom at the apartment is much nicer than your guest room here.

Dave: We’re trying our best, Victoria.

Victoria: And I appreciate it! You know what I also appreciate? Blinds. Can we stop at Lowe’s and get some fro my room one of these days?

Aimee: Okay, I have enjoyed this ambush family meeting very much, but I have to unpack and relax and, you know, I’m pregnant. So I’m going to head upstairs.

Cherie: What are you going to do when you don’t have your pregnancy to use an excuse to get out of things anymore?

Aimee: Probably cry from pure joy at the fact that I no longer have to carry a human being around inside my stomach anymore. And this is never happening again, Dave, so don’t get ANY ideas.

Dave: I didn’t say anything.

Aimee: Were getting you fixed.

Ernesto: She’s kinda grumpy today.

Kimmy: I don’t notice a difference.

Two days later, at Aimee’s fundraiser…

Denise: I can’t believe this turnout! Half of Congress is here!

Aimee: Not half, but, I am beloved.

Denise: Alec flew all the way out from Illinois for this?

Aimee: He’s my best friend, of course he did!

Lynette: Who’s your best friend?

Aimee: Ah, Lynette!

Lynette: I thought so. Wait until I tell Alec and Carolyn I’m your real bestie.

Aimee: It’s really a three-way tie, no need to rustle their feathers.

Lynette: Funny you mention feathers. Does Carolyn look more birdlike today or am I just imagining things?

Aimee: Oh, how I wish I could drink. I should punch Dave for this.

Lynette: Oh, you can drink! My mom drank when she was pregnant!

Aimee: That explains so much.

Geraldine: Hey, Aimee! Can we talk in private real quick?

Aimee: You’re scaring me.

Geraldine: No need to be scared, if I was gonna kill you, I wouldn’t do it here.

Aimee: That did very little to make me less scared.

Geraldine: I just wanted to congratulate you on the success of this fundraiser. Your friend with the frizzy hair -

Aimee: Denise

Geraldine: Yeah, her. She told me you’ve raised over a million dollars from tonight alone.

Aimee: A m- a mil- million dollars?

Geraldine: Yeah, that was my face, too!

Aimee: The election’s in two days, how am I going to spend that much money?

Geraldine: Just don’t spend it on a vacation house or a new car, I’ve seen too many good men go down for that.

Aimee: Isn’t that a felony?

Geraldine: The FEC frowns upon it, as does the FBI.

Aimee: I’ll let Denise figure out what to do with it. Tonight’s fundraiser was only done as a celebration of the campaign, not really about raising money.

Geraldine: Don’t let her buy a vacation house with the money, either! I’ve seen some campaign staffers go down that way, too.

Aimee: Do you know anyone that hasn’t committed campaign funding violations?

Geraldine: I don’t think you have!

Aimee: Have a nice night, Geraldine.

Geraldine: We’re gonna be seeing a lot of each other these next six years!

Aimee: Oh, I am aware.

Sharon: Hey, Aimee!

Aimee: Sharon, you made it!

Sharon: I almost didn’t, I’ve been so busy with my own campaign down in Oregon. But I wanted to support you, my friend. You’ve been a great support system for me and I’m excited to enter this new journey with you by my side.

Aimee: Well, I gotta win first.

Sharon: We’ve both seen the polls.

Aimee: They can be wrong sometimes. Carolyn always tells me that when I’m getting a little too “bold.”

Sharon: Ugh, Carolyn…

Aimee: She is a lot to handle.

Sharon: She’s a traitor.

Aimee Tomato, tomahto.

Denise: Hey, Aimee!

Aimee: Oh sec!

Denise: Okay, no longer than that, though!

Aimee: I’m so glad you came, Sharon. Have fun, fix and mingle. It’s gonna be a nice night.

Sharon: I should probably go find some other senators to talk to, make those connections early, you know?

Aimee: Make sure you talk to Lynette, she hates feeling excluded.

Sharon: are we sure she’s going to win? I know she’s a Republican in Wyoming, but she’s, uh -

Aimee: A lot to handle?

Sharon: Yeah, we can keep going with that if you want.

Aimee: She’s a great person, even if she is somewhat of an airhead. We’re going to have a lot of fun with her.

Sharon: “Fun” is not the top criteria I look for in a US Senator, but at least she should make the Senate retreats more interesting.

Aimee: That’s the spirit! Now, I have to go talk to Denise.

Sharon: See you later, Aimee!

Denise: Aimee, there’s something I need your guidance on.

Aimee: Do we not have enough chicken for all of the guests? My mom can go to the store and whip up some quail if you’d like!

Cherie: I really can, it’s no bother!

Aimee: Mom, where did you come from?

Cherie: I’ve been trying to talk to you since you got here!

Denise: We have enough food. Victor called.

Cherie: I hate that man.

Aimee: Join the club.

Ernesto: Is your mother annoying you, Aimee? I’ll handle her.

Cherie: “Handle” me?

Aimee: You are the neediest parents ever.

Cherie: That’s our job, honey!

Ernesto: Come on, let’s go sign up for karaoke.

Aimee: We’re not doing karaoke, Kimmy just volunteered to sing as free entertainment.

Ernesto: Aimee! I almost found a way out of this for you! Why do you never accept help?

Aimee: Too much damn pride.

Denise: Aimee, I love how much you love your family. I need to address the Victor situation.

Aimee: Oh, right.,

Carolyn: Aimee! Alec threw up!

Alec: I did not! That was Lynette.

Lynette: I’m innocent!

Aimee: I’m gonna burn this place down. Like I’m Carrie.

Alec: Don’t burn it down, it’s not that much vomit.

Margo: I’m sorry, Aimee. That was me. I’m not used to partying this hard.

Aimee: Margo!

Geraldine: This is why I don’t invite Democrats to events. They dont’ know how to behave, they bring diseases…

Victoria: We do not bring diseases! Some of us don’t get vaccinated against the measles but most of us do!

Kimmy: Get vaccinated everyone, it’s good for you!

Margo: Don’t stop singing, I paid for you to sing 7 Rings!

Kimmy: I’m an unpaid volunteer.

Margo: Who did I pay then?

Carolyn: You threw ten dollars at me and said “do an Ariana Grande.”

Margo: That doesn’t sound like me.

Alicia: Aimee, I am so sorry. I’m gonna get Margo out of here.

Aimee: No, why bother? It’s free entertainment.

Kimmy: This was supposed to be MY spotlight! She is stealing it! Not on my watch!

Lynette: I have a headache.

Carolyn: Drink less.

Lynette: I’ve had one glass of wine.

Carolyn: Drinking straight from the bottle doesn’t mean you’re drinking a lower volume.

Lynette: Very funny, Carolyn. So funny, I forgot to laugh!

Aimee: I think I should call Victor outside, Denise.

Denise: That sounds like a good idea.

Margo: Just don’t call him on the front ramp. I threw up there, too.

Carolyn: Did you show up to this drunk?

Margo: I have an illness.

Carolyn: A mental one? We can see that.

Aimee and Denise step outside.

Aimee: What did Victor call about?

Denise: I don’t know, all he said was that you should call him back.

Aimee: He’s always so dramatic.

Denise: There’s no way he can be any more dramatic than whatever was going on in there.

Aimee: We should have them investigate a potential gas leak because… wow.

Aimee picks up the phone and calls Victor.

Victor: Aimee! I’m so glad you called me back. I know you’re having a big fundraiser, I’m sorry I couldn’t be there.

Aimee: With how it’s been going, it’s good you’re not here. Lynette may have actually stabbed you if you showed up.

Victor: Lynette likes to talk tough, but she’s not so scary.

Aimee: She has many guns. She scares me.

Victor: She -

Aimee: Her dad shot a man. The man apologized to him. Her dad continued to serve as Vice President. She scares me.

Victor: Anyway, I just wanted you to know that I recorded a video for you to show at your fundraiser. Greg told me he was doing that and I wanted to take part in the same way. If you’ll have me, of course.

Aimee: Um… this was what was so urgent?

Victor: I’m trying to make things right. I want to be your friend again.

Aimee: Were we ever friends? I thought we were more, um, casual work acquaintances?

Victor: Our relationship has been strained, no?

Aimee: Through no fault of mine.

Victor: Of course not! I screwed up here, not you.

Aimee: Thank you, you’re too kind.

Victor: So, will you play the video? I can send it to your buddy Denise.

Aimee: She’s not my “buddy,” she’s my campaign manager.

Victor: Apologies. I can send it to your campaign manager Denise.

Aimee: I don’t know a message from you will play with the centrist crowd I’ve been recruiting.

Victor: I can send you a big campaign donation. I’ll max it out!

Aimee: I don’t really need more money, the primary’s in two days.

Victor: You can donate it to whatever centrist campaign fund you want.

Aimee: Okay, fine. If this helps you sleep at night, sure.

Victor: Good luck in your campaign, Aimee. I really am rooting for you. I want what’s best for you.

Aimee: That’s almost sweet. I’ll see you at work next week, bye.

Denise: So, what was it about?

Aimee: Some video he wants me to play tonight. He’s just trying to get in my good graces again, it’s kinda nice of him.

Denise: Oh, that’s a letdown. We should probably get back in there now, though. Just in case all hell’s broken loose in the last five minutes.

Inside the fundraiser…

Kimmy (singing): ‘Cause tonight is the night, when two become one!

Aimee: My god, it’s worse than we could’ve imagined. We’re walking into a Spice Girls concert.

Denise: Why are your parents slow dancing to their daughter singing 2 Become 1?

Aimee: I think I’m in hell.

Dave: Aimee, when are you going to speak? It’s getting weird in here!

Alec: We’re having fun!

Dave: You’re drunk!

Alec: Why do people keep saying that?

Aimee: I’m handling it, Dave.

Dave: Hurry, because you know this song gets me in the mood.

Aimee: My sister is singing it!

Dave: I can’t help it! I have a crush on Sporty Spice.

Aimee: What choices in my life led me to this moment?

Denise: She’s done singing, Aimee. Time to get the stage. Get this back on track.

Aimee: We already went off the rails of the crazy train, I think we’re beyond help. I’ll try, though.

Aimee walks up to the stage and grabs the microphone.

Kimmy: Hey, I was about to sing Dancing Queen!

Aimee: You’re young and sweet, now get out before I hit you with a tambourine.

Kimmy: Fine…

Aimee: All right, everyone give it up for my sister, Mel C! She’s great, ain’t she? Maybe we’ll get her a record deal one day.

Kimmy: You’re all too sweet.

Aimee: I know tonight’s been a bit crazy, but I just wanted to thank you for all coming her to support me. No matter the end result, the entire campaign ends in two days, and I couldn’t have made it this far without all of your support. My family, my friends, my work colleagues, you’ve all helped me get here. You’ve given me love and support and kindness and it’s kept me sane in one of the craziest times in my life. I was a longshot when I announced this campaign, and unforeseen circumstances changed things quite a bit. I don’t know how all this ends, but getting to spend this night with you all right before it does end is a true gift. Thank you all for being here and thank you all for standing by me and believing in me. I truly hope to bring this home for us all on Tuesday. Now, a few friends who couldn’t be here tonight have prepared video messages for us. Enjoy the videos, and, since we’re here to have fun, enjoy the wine if you want. Dinner will be ready as soon as the videos are done playing. Thanks again for being here!

What did you think of this episode of Evergreen Aimee? Let us know in the comments, vote in the poll below, and make sure to read the new episode next week!

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