Let's Talk Smoo About: NBC's High Body Count and Many More to Come

Bloodletting seems to be the theme behind a falsely-inflated 1st Place NBC, which had a higher body count than the other broadcast networks resembling a 1980's slasher flick. NBC bid adieu to six series, two of which received half-season swan songs to end these critically acclaimed shows on a high note during their sixth seasons. The other four deserved their grisly fates, which resembled a killing in a run of the mill Friday the 13th sequel as irritated spectators cheered a nuisance being dispatched.
First, Bad Judge and A to Z were a true embarrassment to a network which ruled the sitcom arena in the 80's and 90's. Kate Walsh's talents were squandered on this forgettable sitcom, which I only watched the first 20 minutes of before quitting. Only Fox's Dads topped that honor, as I quit inside of 8 minutes. My poor opinion of Bad Burnoff, as I dubbed it, left me erasing A to Z before it could give it a chance. And the ratings showed I wasn't missing much. NBC recognized it misfired, with its only bragging right being these shows were not nearly as deplorable as the Michael J. Fox show and Sean Saves the World from the previous season. Does anyone really miss these shows? It's been crickets for months in the comments.
Next on NBC's tragic misfires was Constantine. Some are crying for this show's resurrection, but performing poorly even for Friday standards left Constantine vulnerable to becoming a kabob on a cancellation spear. And then there was Allegiance. A show so forgettable even TVBTN failed to generate comments about its cancellation as it was Slap-ped by NBC's other clunker, and even ABC's criminally pathetic American Crime. These four shows suffered their grisly fates, which sadly leads to two losses in NBC's legacy.
There wasn't a dry eye in the house as Parenthood was announced as a shortened final season . Unlike Parks and Rec and CBS's Mentalist, NBC wisely scheduled Parenthood in its familiar territory on Thursdays at 10pm. Perhaps it was a lack of options, or CBS's Elementary performing to pisspoor. But Parenthood received a natural ending, and reached 102 episodes as another sophisticated legacy piece in NBC's rich legacy crown.
The same cannot be said for Parks and Recreation, which was burned off like a bad wart on NBC's knuckles. Why double up on a shortened season when so many series met their fates on the ratings dagger? Had NBC been wise, they would have prolonged Parks' final season with reruns following original showings. Could you imagine if Parks would have made it to May? Their showings ranged between 1.1-1.5, and a Parks rerun would have generated a 0.8 at the least. Here's to NBC's smooie scheduling, and a lack of successful scripted series to show for it.
While I refrained from speculating which shows will joined ABC and CBS' already cancelled shows, I'll indulge myself as NBC generated a high body count, which WILL rise by next week. Will State of Affairs take an axe to the face, satisfying irritated commenters who couldn't get past Katherine Heigl's behavior and called this show State of $h!t? I predict One Big Happy will get a hole poked through it with a firepoker. Marry Me will likely be pushed backwards onto a pitchfork, and will take About a Boy with it as the pitchfork runs through both. Will American Odyssey be drowned in the lake? Or better yet, will Mysteries of Laura outrun the slasher that has bec ome NBC's programming department? You be the judge how the 2014-15 bad horror sequel to NBC's legacy plays out....

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