Gretchen: Thank you, Las Vegas, and remember to get out and vote on November 3rd so Tammy Koobach and I can ensure a kinder, more just America!
Gretchen exits the stage and is greeted by Carol and Susana backstage.
Susana: That was great, Gretchen! You fired up the crowd.
Carol: And we finally got to Nevada. I went to the casino last night!
Gretchen: Is that why you wanted to come here so badly?
Carol: Of course not! I wanted to come because Ron keeps telling me how fragile the lead is here. We’re only up a point and a half. To say that that’s underwhelming for a Democrat in Nevada is an understatement. The casino was just an additional perk.
Gretchen: Can we win the race with margins like that?
Carol: Here? Yes!
Gretchen: The whole race.
Carol: I don't know. Maybe people are just ashamed to admit they’re voting for a person from the same party as Sheryl Howard. They might be underestimating us. They could be overestimating us.
Susana: I hope they aren’t doing that.
Carol: I damn sure hope not, Susana.
Susana: Don’t get mad, mom. Let’s look on the bright side: we get to go back to Rhode Island and remain in power there if we lose.
Gretchen: That’s a negative. You wanna be stuck working with Samantha and Hank for years to come?
Susana: Not really. Still, though. We’ll get through it. This isn’t the end of the line for this rag-tag team, no matter what.
Carol: Let’s get back to the hotel. We need to fly to Phoenix tomorrow morning.
Gretchen: Sounds good. We’ve traveled all across Nevada today and I’m ready to sleep.
One hour later at the hotel…
Gretchen: Oh, god. Can you guys turn that off? I’ve been worrying about politics all day and need some sort of break before I go to sleep.
Christina: Look at what they’re saying about you, mom.
Gretchen: What is it? I’m sure I’ve heard it before.
Christina: That you need to be locked up for your tax cuts.
Anthony: He called you a criminal.
Lucinda: You should see what Ducovney called you. She seems like a lovely woman -
Christina: She isn’t.
Lucinda: She said you should be impeached and called you a fraudulent governor.
Gretchen: What does that even mean?
Lucinda: Apparently she thinks you were elected illegally. I’ll admit, I couldn’t believe you won either, but you won legally.
Gretchen: Thanks, mom.
Lucinda: You’re welcome.
Gretchen: Can we stop worrying about these jerks now? I’ve got less than two hours until I need to sleep.
Lucinda: You’re going to bed at ten? That’s unlike you.
Gretchen: We all need to go to bed earlier than usual. We have to get to Arizona tomorrow.
Lucinda: What’s in Arizona?
Toby: You don’t know what Arizona is, grandma?
Lucinda: I said “what’s IN Arizona,” not “What IS Arizona.”
Toby: Oh, okay.
Gretchen: Can we watch one of our Halloween movies? Tomorrow is Halloween, after all.
Lucinda: Didn’t we watch enough when we were snowed in for a week?
Gretchen: No! We still didn’t watch, uh, Frankenweenie.
Toby: I love Frankenweenie!
Gretchen: There we go, we’re watching Frankenweenie.
There is a knock on the door.
Gretchen: Carol, what happened now? Are we going to El Paso now instead?
Man: Open up, this is the FBI.
Gretchen: Very funny, Carol. Using a voice app now?
Man: This is Eric Butler, an FBI Agent. Not Carol.
Gretchen: You sure?
Eric: Yes!
Gretchen: Secret Service man. Kenny, I think. Is this really the FBI?
Kenny: Yes, Governor Raymond.
Gretchen: Okay, opening up.
Toby: Mom, I’m scared.
Gretchen: Tony, take the kids into the bedroom.
Anthony: Will do.
Lucinda: What about me? What if I’m scared?
Gretchen: Just shut up.
Lucinda: I hope they really are here to lock you up!
Anthony: You better stop hoping for that because you’re getting thrown out of the house if she goes to jail.
Toby: Is mom going to jail?
Anthony: No!
Lucinda: Well… maybe.
Gretchen: Just go already!
Christina: I want to stay. I’m a big girl.
Gretchen: Cool.
Anthony takes Toby into the bedroom and shuts the door. Gretchen opens the door to the hotel room and FBI agents Eric Butler and Monica Ramos enter.
Gretchen: Can I ask what this is about? I don’t have any drugs and haven’t committed any crime here. I didn’t even gamble while I was here.
Monica: That’s your problem, it’s illegal to come to Vegas without gambling.
Gretchen: See, joking about this doesn’t really do anything to make it less terrifying for me.
Christina: What did you do, mom?
Eric: Your mother didn’t do anything. At least, nothing illegal.
Gretchen: What did I do then?
Eric: You ran for public office, and unfortunately that made you a target for some very messed-up individuals.
Gretchen: Uh-huh. Not following. I don’t need the FBI to tell me that Brian Delphy and Dede Ducovney are attacking me on TV.
Eric: That isn’t what we mean.
Christina: What do you mean? We’re very scared.
Eric: The FBI has been investigating for the past few weeks a plot by a militia to storm either your office or, more likely, your personal reference and kidnap you, Governor Raymond.
Gretchen: Yep.
Christina: What? They were going to do what?
Eric: This was not a mere threat made by a few online people who wanted to feel important in the moment and impress some online buddies. This was a group of at least eight men with a detailed plan to take you hostage and potentially execute you in an attempt to overthrow the government of Rhode Island and potentially the entire country.
Lucinda: They aren’t gonna get very far overthrown the government of Rhode Island. What will late get from Rhode Island falling into peril? Shutting down Del’s Lemonade?
Monica: We believe they did this because of how much attention Governor Raymond has been getting lately. They wanted to go after a big name so this would be huge news.
Gretchen: Aww, I’m a big name!
Eric: We wanted to be the first to tell you all about this because arrests of everyone we believe to be involved were made today. In some of their houses, we found detailed maps of the roads around both your house and the Rhode Island State House. Again, this was very detailed and they were getting ready to carry this out shortly.
Gretchen: Thank you for letting me know. Is there anything else to share?
Eric: Not really, that’s the whole thing.
Gretchen: Okay. I’m going to watch a movie with my family then, and then I’m going to sleep. I'm not going to let this bother me because I trust you guys to protect me.
Monica: You should. We’ve already requested additional Secret Service for you and will do everything in our power to keep you safe.
Gretchen: Thank you for dropping by. Goodbye, call me or my assistant Susana if there’s anything else I need to know.
Gretchen walks Eric and Monica out of the hotel room and closes the door behind them.
Gretchen: Oh, my god!
Anthony: We heard the whole thing. Are you okay?
Gretchen: I’m as good as I’m gonna be after that.
Toby: Mommy, I’m scared.
Christina: I wish I could make fun of you, but I’m scared, too.
Lucinda: Does anyone know we’re here, Gretchen?
Gretchen: Not that I’m aware of. We’re safe. None of you need to worry right now.
Christina: Right now?
Gretchen: Ever. Don’t ever worry. I will protect you all. Even you, mom.
Carol bursts into the room.
Gretchen: Carol, you scared the bejeezus out of me!
Carol: Someone’s trying to kidnap you!
Gretchen: A little late, hon’.
Carol: Aww, they told me second?
Susana: Of course they did. Gretchen’s the one with the kidnapping plot against her, not us.
Carol: I thought they would want a friendly face to tell her.
Gretchen: Friendly? You look like you just ran the Providence Marathon.
Carol: I had to run up the steps!
Susana: You need to work out more, mom.
Carol: No I don’t!
Gretchen: See, guys. We’re all safe with Carol here to protect us.
Christina: Mom is so getting kidnapped.
Susana: Gretchen, um, we were just here to ask you how you want to address this publicly.
Carol: We can’t sweep it under the rug, but do you want to go home to speak or do it here?
Gretchen: We’ll go home. Part of the political theater, you know? I can do it in from of the house.
Carol: So we’ll cancel the Phoenix rally. We’re good at canceling rallies, no worries.
Gretchen: So this is how this election wraps up? A kidnapping plot against me. I expected some sort of October Surprise, but not like this.
Susana: Mom, we better get to bed so we can fly out of here. The flight is like seven hours so we’ll have to leave here at about five AM to get home when it’s still light out.
Gretchen: Five AM? We were gonna watch a movie!
Anthony: We can watch it some other time. This is more important. Let’s get to bed.
Gretchen: Fine. We can watch movies on the plane, after all. Bedtime, I guess.
Toby: I’m excited to go home!
Anthony: It’s just for one day. We’ll be on the trail the other six days until the election. Enjoy it!
Gretchen: It’s actually eleven days
Anthony: It is? Oh boy.
Toby: I’m gonna get my Nintendo Switch this time.
Gretchen: That can only happen if we all get to sleep.
Susana: I agree. Let go, mom.
Carol: See you guys tomorrow!
Gretchen: See ya tomorrow.
The next day, at Gretchen’s press conference outside her home in Rhode Island…
Gretchen: It brings me no pleasure to have to take a break from campaigning to address this matter, but as you quite possibly already know, the FBI discovered a plot by a group of men to kidnap me from my home or from the Rhode Island State House. I thank the FBI and the Rhode Island State Police for working together on this investigation and keeping my family and me safe. If they had not been so diligent in their work, my life could be over right now. The media will label this a “militia,” but this was a planned terror attack, meant to destabilize the government here and throw this presidential election into peril. Let me be perfectly clear: I do not blame Brian Delphy or Dede Ducovney for this plot against me. However, words matter and they need to be careful with the words that they choose. Screaming at rallies about locking me up and questioning my legitimacy as governor feeds into the hate that these terrorists have in their hearts. We can and must reject that and have a politics of decency. Run campaigns that don’t label your opponent as the enemy, but rather as an opponent. We can criticize policies without personal, ad hominem attacks. Let’s show each other kindness. Thank you all for listening to me today and I hope that it will inspire you all to be kind to one another.
Gretchen wraps her speech and goes into the house.
Anthony: The phone was ringing, I picked it up.
Gretchen: Who is it?
Anthony: See for yourself.
Tammy Koobach: Gretchen, I saw your speech.
Gretchen: Did you like it?
Tammy: No.
Gretchen: That’s a shame.
Tammy: I loved it! You’ve been a bit of a gaffe machine, but this was very nicely done. I was so sorry to hear about the plot to kidnap you, I hope you’re all doing well.
Gretchen: We’re all okay. We got extra security and we’re just going to have to be more mindful when we’re out and about.
Tammy: I’m glad you’re okay. I actually think this could work in our favor. Ron said your personal approval ratings shot way up in a fast-tracked poll that we commissioned today. There could be a real sympathy vote for us, especially among those that find Delphy and Ducovney’s rhetoric to have contributed to this.
Gretchen: You think so?
Tammy: It’s hard to imagine our poll numbers getting worse.
Gretchen: That is true.
Tammy: I believe we were at 43% in Florida the last time I checked. It’s not great.
Gretchen: Can we win?
Tammy: We have to push hard these last days. I think we can win, but we need to campaign like there’s no tomorrow. Hit every state we can, and win as many votes as we can. Get those late deciders to break for us. Do you feel comfortable getting back to campaigning tomorrow?
Gretchen: Yes, where are we going?
Tammy: How does Georgia sound? There have been some close polls and we can hit up the Carolinas, Florida, even Texas while you're down there.
Gretchen: That sounds good. I’ll go wherever I’m needed.
Tammy: Okay. I’ll have Ron contact Carol for details. I’m heading to Arizona and New Mexico tomorrow since you canceled appearances there. I’m in Nebraska now so it’s closer for me to get there.
Gretchen: Okay, good luck. And Nebraska? Why are you there?
Tammy: Shoring up that one electoral vote in Omaha.
Gretchen: Oh. I forgot they’re weird there.
Tammy: Hey, New England isn’t all good, either. Look at Maine. They split their votes, too.
Gretchen: That’s true. We’re a weird country in general.
Tammy: I weird country I hope we can lead together.
Gretchen: Amen, sister friend.
Gretchen hangs up and decides to go to her office at the State House with Carol and Susana.
Susana: Why did we come here again?
Gretchen: I just wanted to grab some papers and my laptop. You guys didn’t have to come.
Carol: I miss it here. It’s been what, two weeks?
Susana: Four days.
Carol: What?
Susana: Four days.
Samantha: Look what the cat dragged in!
Hank: I thought we had this place to ourselves for a few weeks!
Gretchen: And I thought I told you two to stay out of here and not cause any trouble.
Samantha: We’re just working. I’m acting governor when you’re not here, I’m talking with the other leaders here in the state to make sure things go smoothly.
Gretchen: It’s Rhode Island? What could even happen here? Are you anticipating the calamari squid to start fighting back?
Samantha: I’m not sure if you heard, but a bunch of terrorists were planning to overthrow our government, so I’m making sure everything’s okay. Wouldn’t want this powerful state to be overthrown.
Hank: She’s too busy galavanting around Las Vegas to care what happens here.
Gretchen: I’m running for Vice President! What do you expect me to do? Stay home?
Samantha: We’re pulling your leg! We weren’t even working, we were watching a movie in my office and had to use the bathroom
Gretchen: Oh my god.
Samantha: You guys are all okay, right? I was actually scared for you. You’re very terrible at your job so I’d assume you’re scared it’ll happen again.
Gretchen: We’re fine. I have enough people around me to protect me and to protect my family.
Carol: And to protect Carol!
Gretchen: Yeah, Carol too.
Samantha: I feel like you’re not too high on their target lists.
Carol: You don’t know how powerful I am.
Samantha: Not very?
Hank: Gretchen, I know you’re busy with the campaign but could you look over the email I sent you and get back to me sometime in the next day or so? I gotta go to the bathroom now.
Gretchen: Yes, I will.
Hank: Thanks. Good luck on the campaign trail, I’m rooting for you.
Gretchen: That’s actually sweet. Thanks.
Samantha: I better go, too. We’re watching Scream and Hank’s probably scared.
Susana: I doubt that.
Samantha: You met him, right?
Gretchen: Yeah, Susana. He’s a scaredy-cat.
Samantha: He’s probably thinking that Ghostface will get him in the bathroom so I’m gonna go spook him.
Gretchen: See ya later!
The next day, on the flight to Georgia…
Toby: I don’t like flying with all of these extra people. It’s scary.
Gretchen: They just need to protect us, Toby. Don’t worry.
Toby: Can we watch Frankenweenie?
Gretchen: I don’t think anyone here would mind. Sure.
Lucinda: I mind.
Gretchen: You don’t get a vote.
Christina: How long will we need to travel like this? A few Secret Service agents are okay but this is just weird. I feel like I’m in the Army or something.
Gretchen: Just until the end of the campaign. After that, they’ll just be outside our house and following me to work. Perfectly. Normal. Of course, if we win it’ll probably stay like this forever since the VP gets special protection so as it is.
Christina: Okay, that’s lovely.
Gretchen: How are you guys feeling? You seem okay, but you’ve been through a lot.
Toby: Mom, Frankenweenie is on!
Gretchen: It just started, you can pause it. How are you feeling?
Christina: Mom, I think Toby’s moved on. He just wants to watch this damn movie.
Gretchen: How do you feel, Chris? Not about these guys, who, by the way, everyone, you’re lovely. How do you feel about the kidnapping?
Christina: I’m fine. It didn’t happen and everyone involved has been arrested.
Susana: Not to interrupt your family moment, everyone, but I just saw a news story I think you’ll be interested in.
Gretchen: What is it, Susana?
Susana: They just charged another group of people with plotting to kidnap Governor Franzello from Virginia and another with plotting against Governor Santana from Pennsylvania.
Gretchen: Well, they both raised taxes as well. Probably affiliated groups. Thank god they were caught.
Anthony: This is frightening.
Gretchen: This just makes sense. I mean, Franzello and Scrantana are at least governors of states people live in. They’re getting smarter in which state governments they want to overthrow. Rhode Island isn’t exactly powerful.
Christina: So there wasn’t anything special about mom?
Anthony: I wouldn’t say that.
Gretchen: I would. Delphy and Ducovney went after those two as well, these people just went after whoever their candidates didn’t like. I’m not special.
Carol: So now that we’ve figured that out, let’s watch that movie. I’ve never seen Frankenweenie before.
Gretchen: Okay, sure. Let’s just move along like everything’s normal. Atlanta is only a few hours away, after all, gotta get that movie in before then!
