The Bullpen Season 2 Episode 14: Pitching Change

Kurt: long-term reliever-turned starting pitcher
Lorenzo: middle-relief pitcher
Robert: 8th inning/setup pitcher
Eli: left-handed specialist

Eli: And then there were three.
Robert: I'm bored. 
Lorenzo (waking up): I'm confused. 
Eli: You already ate it.
Lorenzo: I'm talking about why there are only three of us here. We did go to the right place at the right time, right?
Eli: Bryan's with his new kid, Kurt's in the game, and Jason is acting as the pitching coach today because the actual one quit.
Robert: Oh yeah, wasn't he all mad that he could never go to the mound to make a pitching change?
Eli: He was. We weren't. Still don't know how that gets Jason promoted. 
Lorenzo: Is that Kurt pitching? Why is Jason punishing Kurt?
Eli: It was his turn to start today. 
Robert: We really have almost completely ignored the fact that he's a starter now. 
Lorenzo: Think I'll be going in the game?
Eli: Ask the bullpen coach.
Lorenzo: Robert, am I going in the game?
Robert: No, Loren--wait, what makes you think I would be the bullpen coach? 
Lorenzo: Eli said you were.
Eli: I guess I did kind of lead you down that path.
Lorenzo: What do we do now?
Robert: Do what you want Lorenzo, no rules today.
Lorenzo: I'm gonna try out a new game called Duopoly. 
Eli: On your phone?
Lorenzo: No, it's a board game. 
Robert: And you just carry that around wherever you go?
Lorenzo: Of course not. I brought it in yesterday and put it under the bench.
Eli: Guess Robert and I should join you.
Lorenzo: Actually no, you have to play it by yourself. (Opens the box and takes a quick look at the instructions.)
Lorenzo: I take that back, it says you have to play it with other people, not by yourself. 
Robert: I'm really not sure I want to play that right now. Doesn't it take like, 3 hours to play? I would never want to be a part of any game that took that long.
Eli: Actually our baseball games are usually 3 and a half hours.
Robert: I don't play in those games though. I just talk about how they're too long. 
Kurt (coming back to bullpen after inning): Time does fly when you're having fun. 
Lorenzo: Kurt! Want to play Duopoly?
Kurt: They did tell me I'm not coming back in for another inning, so sure. 
Lorenzo: Great! But if the game's over, shouldn't we go home?
Kurt: I know we're all used to pitchers staying in the whole game, but I guess they want someone else for the final few innings. 

Eli: Fine by us. Wait...what's that sound? Whose phone is ringing?
Robert: Not mine.
Kurt: Not mine either.
Lorenzo: I didn't bring my phone. that the bullpen phone?
Eli: I guess so. Who answers it? We don't have a coach anymore!
Kurt: I'll get it. [Answering]  Hello?...Yes, this is the guy who just came out of the game...OK, I'll tell him. [Hangs up the phone] Lorenzo, warm up, you're pitching next inning. 
Lorenzo: About time! Maybe it's not such a bad thing not having a bullpen coach today.
Robert: Why do you want to pitch anyways?
Lorenzo: Garry promised me chicken wings whenever I pitched.

Robert: Garry isn't here any longer and that was a one-time thing.
Lorenzo: Really? I don't want to pitch anymore.
Kurt: You could at least put your uniform on.
Lorenzo: Didn't bring it.
Kurt: This is great.
Lorenzo: I'm just gonna go out there and give it my best. [Walks onto the field]
Robert: So Eli, which one of us should start warming up?
Eli: Give him a chance, maybe it won't be so bad. 
Kurt: Oh it's gonna be bad.
Robert: He just hit a batter. 
Kurt: Did he just get thrown out of the game?
Eli: Looks like it, he's walking closer to us.
Lorenzo: Actually I quit. What's the point if I can't even get rewarded for my pitching? See you guys later, I'm gonna cook some chicken wings for myself. (Lorenzo exits)
Robert: What are they doing now?
Kurt: Is that Jason on the mound?
Eli: Our games just aren't normal, are they?
Robert: No Eli. No they are not.

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