DATE: June 20, 1876. The Indianapolis Primates are playing a home game against the Portland Lobsters. The ballpark is packed, with not one of the 3,000 seats empty nor a spot for anyone else to stand in the bullpen; that is, the area in foul territory where late arrivers gather for a discounted price. Late to the game again include SAMUEL, a railway worker who cheers on the Primates as long as they are winning; ABNER, a shoemaker who only goes to the bullpen for the discount; SALLY, ABNER's wife and a cigar-maker; CHESTER, a printer who took the fall when the Primates' one loss in 1875 made the front page; RALPH, a painter who helped paint the ballpark seats but has no choice but to stand in the bullpen because he is constantly late; and WILLIAM, a factory worker and heavy drinker who makes and loses his money gambling on games.
SALLY
So how was everyone's day?
ABNER
Business is booming, honey. You know that though.
SALLY
I'm so proud of you. Ralph?
RALPH
Another day of running late and not getting to sit in one of the seats I painted so carefully so...not great.
SALLY
I'm sorry to hear that, I hope you can at least enjoy our company.
RALPH
It has nothing to do with you all! Why can't we enjoy one another's company in the main section one day, is all I'm saying.
CHESTER
We'd have to all get here on time, and be able to afford it.
ABNER
I can afford it.
CHESTER
We are aware, Abner. We are aware.
SAMUEL
My day was brutal, if anyone cares to ask.
SALLY
How so?
SAMUEL
How so? I've been working on the railroad all the live-long day!
SALLY
Well I'm sorry to hear that Samuel, but it is your occupation.
SAMUEL
Have you no pity?
WILLIAM
At least you have a job.
SAMUEL
I know, I know, we're all lucky to find work in this economy. It's just...the conditions out there are wretched. But anyway, we're here now, and it's time to enjoy a ballgame.
SAMUEL [to the umpire]
PUT YOUR GLASSES ON YOU DRATTED FOOL!
RALPH
I didn't even see anything happen.
SAMUEL
Nothing needs to happen to give the umpire a hard time. It wouldn't be baseball otherwise.
SALLY
You don't suppose he's rigging it?
ABNER
Rigging it? Sally, you and I both know if he was rigging it, it'd be for our guys.
SALLY
There's a first for everything.
ABNER
Well I suppose you could be right.
ABNER, SALLY, WILLIAM, RALPH, SAMUEL, and CHESTER watch as the umpire fails to call a Portland Lobsters player out at the plate, despite him not being safe by much. The crowd starts booing the umpire.
CHESTER
WHERE ARE YOUR SPECTACLES?!
RALPH
GO HOLD YOUR HEAD IN SHAME, WILL YA?
WILLIAM
HOW DOES THIS FOOL STILL HAVE A JOB WHEN SO MANY WORKING CLASS FOLKS JUST LOST THEIRS!
ABNER, SALLY, RALPH, SAMUEL, and CHESTER turn their attention toward WILLIAM.
SAMUEL
William...something on your mind?
WILLIAM
There was a factory closure today. I've been trying to say it.
SALLY
William, I am so sorry. If there's anything Abner and I can do...
ABNER
Sally, we're not spending money on William's idleness.
WILLIAM
I still have a job. It was the factory down the road. And thanks for the charity, Abner.
ABNER
Then what do you care?
WILLIAM
All those people lost work today, and they're already struggling. And my factory could be next. You don't know.
RALPH
He's right Abner, he could be next.
CHESTER
Yeah, I'd bet on it if I were a betting man.
WILLIAM
How much?
CHESTER
You can't be serious.
WILLIAM
I will bet you four dollars I will be laid off next.
CHESTER
William, I'm not taking that bet.
WILLIAM
Smart. It's a bet I'd win.
SALLY
Say, Samuel, do the railway workers need any help?
SAMUEL
Do we? We need all the help we can get. But we won't get any.
RALPH
I have an idea.
ABNER
Don't just blurt that out, say what it is!
RALPH
We forget all about this and watch a ballgame. Isn't that what we're here for?
WILLIAM
I reckon it is. Now who wants to cause some more chaos with me?
SALLY
After what happened last week? You're on your own there, pal.
WILLIAM
Fine.
WILLIAM starts making odd noises.
SALLY [to ABNER]
Is he okay?
ABNER [to SALLY]
I think he's mocking a lobster. Let's just...slowly back away before people realize we're associated with him.
RALPH [to ABNER]
Chester, Samuel, and I want in on that plan.
ABNER
Then let's go!