NBC Greenlights Crime Series ’The Thing About Paramount’ After CBS Axes SWAT and FBI Spinoffs

The television industry can be a brutal one, right down to how production companies retaliate for cancelling their shows. Having scored modest success in 2022 with True-Crime series "The Thing About Pam," NBC has ordered "The Thing About Paramount," a series detailing the company's criminal cancellation of Universal and Paramount co-produced spinoffs FBI: International and FBI: Most Wanted. Universal appears to be a scorned former partner, having greenlit the series before even developing a plot or a core cast.

Given few to no people remember the FBI shows are still on the air, NBC sought to also profile a criminally cancelled series and has pulled SWAT into the fold, hoping to capitalize on the star power of Shemar Moore. Moore was unavailable for comment, but industry insiders suspect the actor, while disheartened his longstanding series was cancelled, would never stoop to such behaviors by starring in a revenge flick. Also approached was fallen sitcom star Roseanne Barr, who cited being too busy scrubbing the toilets in her home to get that much dirt under her fingernails picking up a script for a stinker of a show such as this. To be turned down by a fallen star leaving the vibe this is beneath even her demonstrates a troubled production.

While details have been scarce on the premise, the series appears to be a smear campaign against CBS, which has been trouncing NBC in ratings as well as streaming with a plethora of scripted series. One must ask what could NBC scorch about CBS without viewers remembering their scheduling was so atrocious that CW had a better lineup? Also approached to return to the "Thing About" anthology were Josh Duhamel and Judy Greer, who starred as attorneys Joel Schwartz and Leah Askey, respectively. Duhamel politely declined, while Greer, despite being given a plum role playing a narcissistic prosecutor, cited workplace hazards having worn a hideous wig in The Thing About Pam which left her with rugburn and fearing looking into a mirror for months.

What could be more hideous than NBC ordering a series like this on their schedule? It would be far more hideous if it wasn't an April Fool's Joke and they actually stooped to scheduling this dreck.