Gretchen walks into her office.
Gretchen: Last work day before Christmas! You girls ready for it?
Carol: Pretty much. Are you ready for it? You sound stuffy.
Gretchen: I just came in. It’s just cold outside! I’m fine.
Carol: You sure?
Gretchen: Yeah! I certainly better be, I have a lot to do before Christmas.
Carol: Like what?
Gretchen: I gotta wrap, and I still need to decorate, and I have to bake -
Carol: There are four days until Christmas and you haven’t even decorated?
Gretchen: I’m behind this year. Anthony put the lights up outside, I just have to put stuff up inside. I have to cook, too. I probably should also do some last-minute shopping. I may need to write out my cards, too.
Sarita: A bit late for that, no?
Gretchen: There’s plenty of time for them to arrive!
Sarita: Sure. Let’s say that.
Carol: Are you really going to get all that done in time?
Gretchen: I’m a perennial holiday procrastinator. Besides, I’m too busy to get anything done. I’m a governor! My time off is the only time I can worry about silly things like decorating and baking.
Carol: You’re governor of Rhode Island, it’s not like you’re busy traveling across the state like real governors.
Gretchen: Real governors?
Carol: It’s almost Christmas! How exciting!
Gretchen: Smooth!
Carol: I thought so.
Gretchen sneezes.
Sarita: You sure you’re fine?
Gretchen: Allergies! Nothing more!
Sarita: In December?
Gretchen: I have December-specific seasonal allergies.
Sarita: Maybe just stop or some cold medicine, just in case.
Gretchen: No time! I’m fine!
Samantha: Hey ladies!
Carol: Stay away, Pratt! She’s sick!
Samantha: I’m not sick!
Carol: I meant Gretchen is sick.
Gretchen: I’m not sick, either!
Carol: Something’s going on here.
Gretchen: Allergies!
Samantha: Anyway, I just wanted to drop off Christmas gifts for all of you.
Gretchen: Are you trying to bribe me for my endorsement?
Samantha: No, it’s Christmas, the time you do nice things for one another.
Gretchen: I’ll be honest, I didn’t get you anything.
Samantha: I expect nothing in return but smiles. Open your gifts!
Sarita: You even got me something?
Samantha: Of course!
Gretchen: Oh my god, this is… something.
Samantha: Do you love it?
Carol: Oh, we all got the same sweater!
Samantha: I got one, too! We can all match!
Gretchen: It is… really excellent.
Samantha: I knew you’d appreciate it!
Later that day…
Anthony: Gretchen, are you going to put these decorations out? I not, I’ll take it up to the attic. They’re just sitting in the living room.
Gretchen: I’ll get to it. Maybe tomorrow! We can’t just have a bare tree up, it’s Christmas!
Anthony: I’d be. One with anything. As long as we’re together.
Gretchen: Speaking of which, any word on when Christina’s getting here?
Anthony: Tomorrow morning, or afternoon. She’s gonna pack up tonight and head here tomorrow after she gets something to eat. She said she has to stop and get a few things at the store. But sometime early tomorrow, for sure.
Gretchen: I’ll have to wrap her gifts before then.
Toby: I haven’t seen you wrapping any other gifts. Don’t forget about me!
Gretchen: I never would! I’m just going to have to wrap your gifts in my bedroom, where I can lock the door and make sure no one is spying early!
Lucinda: Gretchen, you sound terrible.
Anthony: It’s Christmas, do we need to pick on her?
Lucinda: I’m not trying to be mean. I’m just pointing out that Gretchen sounds under the weather. Is that not allowed?
Gretchen: No! I’m fine! I’m not letting some allergies ruin my Christmas spirit.
Lucinda: If you insist.
Gretchen: I do!
The next morning…
Anthony: Honey, you gotta get up. It’s almost ten.
Gretchen: Oh my god.
Anthony: How late were you up wrapping?
Gretchen: I don’t know, like 10:30?
Anthony: I was up later than that watching TV in bed! I just saw the light on out in the living room and figured you were working.
Gretchen: I fell asleep on the floor and only came in here at like two. I don’t feel well at all.
Anthony: What’s wrong?
Gretchen: My throat, I ache, I have a headache… it’s bad.
Anthony: Your mom did say -
Gretchen: I don’t want to hear! I heard it once, it was bad enough.
Anthony: Do you want me to get you some medicine?
Gretchen: No, I have to get up. I have so much to do for Christmas!
Anthony: You need to focus on getting better so you can enjoy Christmas.
Gretchen: I can’t enjoy it if I’m not ready for it. I need to bake, write out cards, clean, decorate, cook, wrap, buy some more presents -
Anthony: We can do it all.
Gretchen: Excuse me?
Anthony: I have off the rest of the week, I can work to get all of that done. And your mom and the kids can help me.
Gretchen: I could never expect that of you.
Anthony: It’s the least I can do. You just sleep and relax and focus on healing. I’m going to make you some tea.
Gretchen: Tea?
Anthony: Yeah! You need to stay hydrated, and there’s nothing better to hydrate you now than tea.
Gretchen: I’m going to sleep some more. When I wake up, you can make it. Okay?
Anthony: That’s fine. You do need to take some medicine first, though. Hopefully, when you wake up, you’re feeling better.
An hour later…
Lucinda: Where is my daughter? Still asleep?
Anthony: She’s not feeling well.
Lucinda: See! Told you so!
Toby: Are you taking a victory lap over mom being sick?
Lucinda: I love to be right.
Anthony: I told her we’d pick up the slack for her on everything she has to do for Christmas.
Lucinda: Excuse me?
Anthony: It’s the least we can do.
Lucinda: You signed me up to do holiday chores? It’s not my fault she procrastinated!~
Anthony: She’s sick and already had more to do in three days than one person could realistically do. We have to all chip in to get this done.
Toby: I’m willing to help!
Anthony: Thank you, Toby. If only we could all be as enthusiastic about being holiday helpers.
Lucinda: I‘m old, I’m well past my days of being a holiday helper.
Anthony: You can come out of retirement for one day! We can get it all done I we work together. Someone can do the cards, someone else can bake, someone else can cook, someone else can decorate and clean, someone else can wrap…
Lucinda: How many of us do you think there are?
Anthony: Once Christina comes, four. We’ve got enough hands to get this done.
Lucinda: I sign up to write cards and bake.
Anthony: Are you planning to just buy cookies and pies from Costco?
Lucinda: What sicko would do that?
Anthony: You.
Lucinda: I won’t. I promise.
Anthony: Okay. Sounds good! I will take on cooking and cleaning. Toby, could you decorate?
Toby: Yeah!
Anthony: And that means Christian can wrap. Toby, you can wrap her presents, okay?
Toby: Hopefully you didn’t get her too many.
Anthony: That reminds me, I have to go to the store! Your mom didn’t buy everyone’s gifts yet.
Toby: Excuse me?
Anthony: Don’t worry, I got your list.
Lucinda: Well, I’m going to bake while you’re out of the house. For no particular reason.
Later that day…
Christina: Wow, what’s going on here?
Anthony: We’re all preparing for Christmas.
Christina: Doesn’t mom usually do… all of this?
Anthony: She’s sick. We’re helping out. It helps keep her mind at ease, I know she feels awful about being under the weather at this time off year. She loves Christmas so much.
Christina: I’m sorry to hear that. It’s nice you’re all pitching in to get ready for Christmas, though.
Toby: Grandma, is there a reason thee’s a box of cards in the trash?
Lucinda: Shh!
Anthony: Do I have to do everything myself? By the way, Christina, you’re wrapping the presents once you get settled in.
Toby: I’m decorating beautifully, and making great time!
Christina: I’m doing what now?
Anthony: Wrapping. It’s a small sacrifice to make your mother happy at this troubling time.
Christina: It is a small sacrifice, I suppose. Let me take my suitcase to my room and I’ll get to work.
Anthony: Don’t let anyone see their presents, please.
Christina: Wouldn’t dream of it!
Anthony: Now, do I have to write out cards, too?
Lucinda: No, I did them!
Anthony: Then what’s in the trash?
Lucinda: I see no reason to not just tell anyone wondering where their card is that the postal service lost it.
Anthony: Some people’s mothers…
Two days later…
Eddie: These cookies taste familiar. Are they from Costco?
Lucinda: Nope! I made them!
Anthony: Did you do anything I asked you to?
Lucinda: I had to get in the car, drive to Costco… dammit!
Anthony: At least she admitted it.
Mary: It’s so weird having Christmas Eve without Gretchen. She’s sort of the heart of the family.
Eddie: I think you’re confusing her with me.
Mary: No.
Eddie: What can I say?
Anthony: We’re hoping she’ll be feeling well enough to join in tomorrow’s festivities. She’s felt so bad about, well, feeling bad.
Eddie: She shouldn’t feel bad. She can’t help it.
Anthony: I know. But she loves Christmas so much, and she feels awful that she couldn’t take part in making the season special for everyone.
Mary: She’s always worked so hard to make Christmas memorable for us. If she wasn’t. feeling well enough this year to get everything done, then that’s fine. She’s earned some good rest.
Eddie: Well said!
Toby: I decorated the house! I’m very proud of it!
Mary: As you should be!
The next morning…
Gretchen: Anthony! Wake up! It’s Christmas!
Anthony: Gretchen! You look great!
Gretchen: I’m feeling so much better. All that rest did me so well. I feel refreshed. Almost better than I did before I was sick!
Anthony: Does that mean you can enjoy Christmas with all o jus?
Gretchen: It does.
Anthony: Sounds like a Christmas miracle to me!
Gretchen: Let’s not go that far. I don’t want to sound crazy or anything. I survived a cold, not the plague.
Anthony: Ah, nothing more Christmassy than the plague.
Gretchen: Very Dickensian, no?
What did you think of the Raymond Island holiday special? Raymond Island will return next spring for the remainder of season seven!
