Marietta Season 2, Episode 5
The Fool on The Hill
Betty Benoit is walking out of the Senate when Kate stops her.
Kate: Betty! Wait up!
Betty: What do you want, Kate? Trying to convince me to vote to save healthcare again? Not gonna happen, got enough flak from Greg and Harry about that the first time, I’m not doing it again. Sorry Louisiana, not like you need Medicare all that much.
Kate: How did you get elected?
Betty: I’m fun. I’m cool. I’m attractive. I’m charismatic. I’m a Republican.
Kate: I’m not here to talk about healthcare or how you have somehow succeeded in politics. I am having a party on Friday to celebrate Thanksgiving before we go on recess and I wanted to invite you to it since I every senator is invited. It’s senators and spouses-only, because with 100 people invited you really can’t give them more than a plus one. All that we’re asking is that you either bring a large plate of food or donate some money to cover the cost of food.
Betty: Oh, I’m sorry Kate. My daughter has a dance recital back in Louisiana on Friday and I’m leaving right after the Senate session ends on Thursday.
Kate: I completely understand. Maybe next year.
Betty: That sounds great, I’ll mark my calendar.
Kate: You already have a 2020 calendar? I’m not nearly as prepared as you are.
Betty: No, I don’t. I use the calendar app on my phone.
Kate: Oh, because you're fun and cool.
Betty: Exactly!
Kate: You know Betty, you’re not nearly as bad as Patty Lynn continuously says you are.
Betty: She’s really not wrong, I was pretty miserable back during the 2018 race. Now though, after going through a major period of change, I’m trying to be happier.
Kate: I’m glad to hear that. This chamber is at its best when we can all have a working relationship with one another, even if we disagree.
Betty: I agree. Now I really better get going. My husband and I are going out for dinner tonight to celebrate our anniversary and I just saw his car pull up.
Kate: You have a good night.
Betty: You too! See you tomorrow, I guess.
Kate: See ya then!
Betty heads down the stairs and gets into her husband Cooper’s car.
Betty: Happy anniversary!
Cooper: Happy anniversary! It’s been painful not getting to see you all day.
Betty: Oh Cooper. You’re still so romantic.
Cooper: How couldn’t I be when my wife is still so lovely twenty five years later?
Betty: I guess I do look pretty good yet. On a serious note, where are we going to eat?
Cooper: There’s this lovely little restaurant in the town my parents live.
Betty: You want to go all the way to Lakey tonight? That’s pretty far, isn’t there anywhere around home you’d like to go?
Cooper: Sure, we can do that. After all, your mom can probably only stand watching the kids for so long. They can be pretty rambunctious.
Betty: I also have to get to work early tomorrow. The Louisiana delegation is having their annual gumbo making competition tomorrow and I can’t miss that. Vera actually thinks she’s gonna take it and I can’t let that happen. No one’s breaking my three-year streak.
Cooper: I have no doubt you’re winning again. You make the best gumbo of anyone I know.
Betty: You know it.
Cooper: So, what kind of food are you in the mood for? I think Senator Hagelin is behind us and she probably wants us to get out of her way.
Betty: Know any good seafood places? I could go for a nice shrimp scampi right about now.
Cooper: I don’t have a job, Betty. Of course I know good seafood places! What do you think I do when you’re at work and the kids are at school? Sit at home and watch General Hospital? I explore the town!
Betty: I’m glad you’re getting to know DC. It’s really starting to feel like a second home to me.
Cooper: I feel the same way.
Later that night…
Betty: Oh my goodness, it’s so late!
Cooper: Betty, it’s just past 10 o’clock.
Betty: I know, but I still have to shower and I need to get us super early tomorrow since I need to get my gumbo ready to take in to work. And since you picked me up yesterday and I let my car in a parking lot, I need you to drop me off tomorrow. So you have a busy morning, too.
Cooper: But did you have a good anniversary?
Betty: Well, yes. Of course I did.
Cooper: Then that’s what matters.
Betty: You’re right. I’ll just have to run on less sleep than normal. It’ll be fine. Plus, I don’t think anyone would mind if I napped in my office for a while.
Cooper: There you go! What a great idea!
Betty: I know, I am pretty clever.
Cooper: It’s one of my favorite qualities of yours.
Betty: Aww.
Betty and Cooper walk into their house and are immediately greeted by their kids, Clara and Eddie.
Betty: Well hello guys! What are you doing awake at this hour?
Clara: Grandma said we could stay up until you guys got home.
Betty: Oh did she? How sweet of her. Now, get on to bed. You have school tomorrow and it’s almost 10:30. You know your bedtime is ten.
Clara: Good night mom!
Eddie: Good night!
Betty: Goodnight guys. See you tomorrow.
Clara and Eddie go upstairs to bed.
Betty: Mom!
Cheri (Betty’s mom): What dear? Did you have a good night?
Betty: Why did you let the kids stay up?
Cheri: They wanted to see you!
Betty: That’s lovely, really. But they have to go to school tomorrow and I want them to get some sleep.
Cheri: We were watching those Christmas baking shows on the Food Network, they were probably half asleep already.
Betty: Just don’t let them manipulate you into letting them stay up late again. They’re tricky like that sometimes. Even Cooper falls for it sometimes.
Cooper: I have never!
Betty: I got home from a long day of confirmation hearings in March and the kids were still awake. It was almost midnight.
Cooper: They wanted to see you!
Betty: See, there’s the manipulation. They just like staying up late.
Cheri: Stars, they’re just like up.
Betty: I don’t know what that means, but sure. Anyway, I’m going to take a shower so I can get to bed. I’ll see you all tomorrow.
The next morning…
Betty: Thanks for dropping me off. I’ll see you later tonight, Cooper.
Cooper: You’re welcome. Just don’t forget your gumbo in the back seat!
Betty: Oh my goodness, thank you! I almost forgot!
Betty grabs her pot of gumbo and rushes into the Senate, nearly tripping on the way.
Ellie: Betty Benoit, are you okay?
Betty: Yeah, Ellie. I’m just a little tired today. And you can call me Betty.
Ellie: I like to say your last name. It’s so pretty. Benoit, so elegant.
Betty: Why thank you. Trust me, I’ve heard that many times on the campaign trail. Can’t take credit for that, though. It’s all on my husband. My maiden name is Cardier.
Ellie: That’s pretty too! My name’s boring, Wilson. Maiden name also Wilson.
Betty: Your husband has the same last name as your maiden name?
Ellie: Oh, no. I kept my maiden name.
Betty: How peculiar. You New Englanders and your weird traditions never cease to amaze me.
Ellie: It’s not a New England thing, Betty. It’s just a thing I decided to do because I liked my name.
Betty: Oh, that’s sweet. Now if you excuse me, I have to get this gumbo to my office so I can get to the HELP committee hearing.
Ellie: HELP? Isn’t that hearing at ten?
Betty: I thought it was at seven.
Ellie: Kate! When is the HELP hearing with the Secretary of Education nominee?
Kate: It’s at ten.
Betty: Are you kidding me? I didn’t even need to rush here after being up so late last night? Oh man.
Ellie: Go nap in your office, it’s what I always do when I’m tired and I have some free time.
Betty: I thought about that. Guess I should go do it. Just let Kenny know what’s going on in case I’m late. I don’t want him thinking I’m dead or anything.
Ellie: Just because a similar thing happened to Joe Carmichael four months ago doesn’t mean Kenny’s gonna think you’re dead. But I’ll tell him anyway. We’re on Appropriations together anyway so I’ll see him before the HELP hearing.
Betty: Thank you! You’re pretty nice for the opposition.
Ellie: Same to you. You’ve got a whole new attitude recently and I like it.
Betty: I like it, too.
Six hours later…
Betty: Alright everyone, let’s get this gumbo competition started! I have a streak to keep alive!
Rob Cheravoix (Louisiana Senator): You aren’t winning it again, Betty. A senator hasn’t won this competition since Marietta Landfield started twenty years ago.
Betty: That’s because you and Marietta couldn’t cook to save your lives. I can.
Rob: Don’t get too cocky. Vera was a chef before she was elected.
Betty: I will still wipe the floor with her. I spent a week on this recipe and everyone who has tested it says it’s my best yet.
Rob: Your entire family knows how seriously you take this competition. You think they’d tell you if they didn’t like it?
Betty: Of course. They’d never lie to me.
Rob: Sure.
Ginnie Pappadone (Louisiana Representative): We need to start tasting all of the dishes, everybody. We do all work in Congress, it’s not like we have infinite time for eating gumbo.
Betty: Virginia, take a chill pill. This is important.
Ginnie: I’m “chill.” But we need to hurry this up, because we only have about thirty minutes until a house vote.
Betty: Alright, everyone line on up and taste my winning meatball and mozzarella gumbo!
Rob: Going with Italian this year, Betty? Bold choice.
Betty: Sometimes bold choices must be made! I had to serve something completely different this year now that I’ve got some competition.
Vera Jordiin (Louisiana Representative): I’m not just competition, Betty. I’m going to be the one that finally beats you.
Betty: Dream on, girl.
Vera: Did you just call me “girl?”
Betty: Indeed.
Vera: You won’t be calling me that when I win.
Betty: I won’t be calling you anything then. Because it’s not happening.
The Louisiana delegation tastes the eight different gumbos and votes. Ten minutes later, the results are announced.
Ginnie: As the host of the 21st Annual Marietta Landfield Memorial Louisiana Delegation Gumbo Competition -
Betty: Do we really need to call it that? She didn’t die or anything.
Ginnie: She started the whole thing and now she’s not here to take part so we have renamed it for her.
Betty: Alright. But don’t y’all take that out on me. Louisiana voted her out, not me.
Ginnie: I mean, technically you did too since I assume you voted for yourself. But we’re not taking anything out on you. This is all nonpartisan.
Betty: I sure hope so.
Ginnie: As I was saying before Senator Benoit interrupted, it is my duty as host of this contest to announce the results. Without further ado, the congressperson in eighth place is… Rob Cheravoix.
Rob: I tried. As always, I failed.
Ginnie: It tasted like dishwater, my dear friend. But less than last year, so you’re getting better!
Rob: Thank you?
Ginnie: Taking seventh is… Brad Welch.
Brad: Was it the fact that I forgot the meat?
Ginnie: Sixth place goes to Roger Grenadier!
Roger: Not last, I’ll take it.
Ginnie: I take fifth place, ensuring that I won’t be hosting this competition any longer because my gumbo was better than that and I know it!
Vera: I liked it.
Betty: Oh get off your high horse, Vera with the weird last name.
Ginnie: Fourth place goes to Thom Morgan.
Thom: My wife may have helped out in that, just a tad.
Ginnie: Max Herford, you take third place!
Max: Wow! I never saw that coming!
Ginnie: Only two left standing! The winner of the 21st Annual Marietta Landfield Memorial Gumbo Competition Louisiana Delegation Gumbo Competition is… a tie!
Betty: What?
Ginnie: Betty Benoit and Vera Jordiin had the exact same number of points, meaning you will share the victory this year!
Betty: How could this happen? Did you not like the mozzarella? Was it not traditional enough?
Ginnie: Betty, we liked it. You won. It just wasn’t a solo victory.
Betty: This victory will always have an asterisk on it, I guess.
Ginnie: You and Marietta are so similar, it’s truly scary.
That night, when Betty gets home…
Betty: I’m home, everyone!
Cooper: Betty! How was your gumbo competition?
Betty: I didn’t win?
Cooper: Who beat you?
Betty: Nobody.
Cooper: What? Nobody won?
Betty: They declared it a tie. So nobody won.
Cooper: Were you at least one of the winners?
Betty: Yes. Me and Vera Jordiin, who is now my mortal enemy.
Copper: Oh Betty. By the way, Marietta Landfield called today. She said to call back when you get the message.
Betty: I wonder what she wants. I better give her a call.
Cooper: Are you two on friendly terms now? I never expected to hear her voice on our answering machine.
Betty: Circumstances change sometimes. I’m trying to be nicer to some people.
Cooper: I’m very proud of you.
Betty grabs the phone and calls Marietta.
Marietta: Betty Benoit! Just the person I was looking to talk to.
Betty: I was surprised to hear you called today. What’s going on?
Marietta: I heard you were going to be in town over the weekend, and since we’re trying to patch things up between us, I wanted to invite you to dinner at the mayor’s mansion. Tammy’s busy that day and I’m all by myself in this big place, so I thought you and your family could stop by.
Betty: Kate.
Marietta: What about her?
Betty: She must be how you found out I was going to be in New Orleans.
Marietta: Obviously. She’s the sweetest woman alive, but she couldn’t keep a secret to save her life.
Betty: I would love to come over for dinner. One less night for me to cook while I’m back in town.
Marietta: That’s great! I know your daughter has a dance recital on Friday, so would Saturday work for you?
Betty: That sounds great. See you then!
Two days later…
Betty: Kids, get in the car!
Clara: Where are we going?
Betty: The airport, silly. We have to go back for your dance recital.
Clara: Tonight? But it’s way later than we would usually fly.
Batty: Clara, I had to work today. I left early for this flight. Your recital is tomorrow, we need to go tonight. I explained all of this to you already, sweetie. We even packed last night.
Clara: I didn’t realize that was for today.
Betty: We stayed up late just to get it all done. I let you stay home from school today.
Clara: Oh, so that’s why you let us stay home.
Betty: Oh dear.
Cooper: Betty, I got everything in the car. How’s the time looking?
Betty: It’s 2:30 and the flight leaves at 5:30. We should make it if we go now.
Cooper: Alright kids, get in the car. Grandma’s already out there waiting for you.
Eddie: Can I take my iPad with me?
Cooper: Sure. Just don’t forget your charger like last week.
Betty: We have everything ready?
Cooper: Yes, I’m certain of it.
Betty: Okay, let’s get to the airport! We have a flight to catch!
Clara: Mom, where’s Mr. Giggles?
Betty: Cooper, did you pack Mr. Giggles?
Cooper: Huh?
Betty: Her stuffed rabbit!
Cooper: Oh, no.
Betty: Let me run upstairs really quickly and grab it!
The next day, after Clara’s recital…
Clara: Mom, I think I forgot Mr. Giggles backstage.
Betty: You brought him with?
Clara: I needed him, for emotional support.
Betty: I’ll go get him.
Betty rushes across the street to get Clara’s toy.
Cooper: Betty, watch out!
What did you think of the episode? Comment your thoughts, listen to the official season two playlist below and make sure to catch a new episode in two weeks!
