What In The World! Season 2 Episode 4: Phoenix Ass

EXT. GREEN PARK GATED COMMUNITY - NIGHT
Two men drag Joel through the neighborhood of a gated community. They take him to the backyard of a house where there is a shed. One of the men opens the shed. Inside, Daniel and Bailey sit against the wall. They are covered in dirt and their hair is messy. The men throw Joel into the shed. Joel’s face is bloody and bruised. The men close the gate. Daniel and Bailey crawl over to Joel.
DANIEL
Are you ok?
Joel spits blood.
JOEL
Yep.
BAILEY
What’re we gonna do?
Sometime Earlier.
INT. HOUSE DAY - DAY
Joel, Tyler, Hudson, and Greg are sitting in front of the tv watching ZOMBEES 3: QUEEN BEE.
JOEL
Is it just me or do these movies get better with each sequel?
GREG
They do. I hear the fourth one takes place in space.
HUDSON
The fifth one involves the multiverse.
JOEL
Hey, where’s Dan and Bailey?
TYLER
Uhhhhh I think they’re cleaning the bathroom.
JOEL
Clean freaks. Both of them.
In the bathroom, Daniel and Bailey are making out. Daniel pulls away.
DANIEL
I love you.
BAILEY
What?
DANIEL
I-I love you.
Awkward silence.
DANIEL
Don’t... don’t you love me?
BAILEY
Ummmmmmm.
DANIEL
Bailey.
BAILEY
I- I do. Yeah, I do.
DANIEL
Cool. Cool cool cool.
Awkward silence.
DANIEL
Should we continue... kissing?
BAILEY
I think we should join the others, they might already be suspicious.
Daniel and Bailey exit the bathroom and join the others in the living room. Joel gets up and goes to the fridge and opens it. There is no beer.
JOEL
Guys, we have a problem.
DANIEL
What?
JOEL
We’re out of beer.
BAILEY
Seriously? When are you gonna realize you're an alcoholic?
JOEL
I’m not an alcoholic. I just drink a lot of alcohol.
GREG
Why don’t you just have a soda?
JOEL
I don’t want a soda. I want a beer.
DANIEL
Well, unless you want to go to the Amazon facility, you’ll just have to wait until we do our next supply run.
JOEL
Fine, I’ll go by myself.
BAILEY
I’ll go with you.
JOEL
What?
BAILEY
I need some new shampoo.
DANIEL
What’s wrong with the one you have now?
BAILEY
It has a lot of chemicals.
Joel rolls his eyes.
JOEL
Fine, but only because you can help me hold more beer.
DANIEL
I’ll go too.
JOEL
Fantastic, now we can carry even more beer.
Joel, Bailey, and Daniel get ready to leave. Greg walks over to them holding Sugar Mama.
GREG
Hey, while you’re there, can you fill her up with more syrup.
JOEL
Are you serious?
GREG
Yes.
JOEL
Ugh fine. Just don’t start Zombees 4 without me.
Joel takes Sugar Mama and places her in his bag.
EXT. HOUSE - DAY
Joel, Bailey, and Daniel walk out of the house and to the car. They get in. Unbeknownst to them, they are being watched by men and women with binoculars. They are armed with rifles, pistols, and blades.
EXT. AMAZON FACILITY - DAY
The car pulls into the Amazon facility parking lot and Daniel, Joel, and Bailey get out.
INT. AMAZON FACILITY - DAY
JOEL
Okay, you go get your girl stuff. Dan and I will be in the beer section.
BAILEY
Whatever.
They separate and go to different parts of the stores. Bailey looks at the different shampoos. Joel and Daniel arrive at some open boxes full of beer.
JOEL
Fuck yeah.
Joel starts gathering the beer.
DANIEL
Hey, can I ask you something?
JOEL
Sure.
DANIEL
Did you ever tell any of your girlfriends that you loved them?
JOEL
No. I always made sure never to get to that point. Why do you ask?
DANIEL
Just curious.
JOEL
That’s a weird thing to be curious about. Now, let's have a few drinks shall we?
Bailey walks down the aisle and arrives at the beer section. She and Daniel look at each other awkwardly. Joel and Daniel are sitting against the wall drinking beer. Cans of beer surround them.
BAILEY
Are you kidding?
JOEL
What?
BAILEY
I was gone for ten minutes.
JOEL
Did it take you ten minutes to find shampoo?
BAILEY
A lot of them have chemicals.
JOEL
Whatever. Start loading up the carts. I’m gonna go refill Sugar Mama and these boxes in the car.
Joel leaves.
Bailey starts loading the cart full of beer. Daniel helps her.
DANIEL
Can we talk?
BAILEY
About what?
DANIEL
About me saying I love you.
BAILEY
We don’t have to talk about it.
DANIEL
I think we do. I’m sorry if it made you uncomfortable but I meant it.
BAILEY
It didn’t make me uncomfortable.
DANIEL
So then what’s the problem?
BAILEY
Nothing. It’s just... I don’t know.
EXT. AMAZON FACILITY - DAY
Joel carries his beer to the car.
As he loads the beer into the back, the sound of cars can be heard growing louder. He turns around and sees three cars approaching the facility.
JOEL
Shit.
Joel grabs a shotgun and an assault rifle from the car and runs back to the facility.
INT. AMAZON FACILITY - DAY
Daniel and Bailey awkwardly fill their bags with beer.
Joel runs over to him.
JOEL
We have a problem.
DANIEL
What’s wrong?
JOEL
Three cars are heading here.
BAILEY
That is a problem.
Joel tosses the shotgun to Bailey and the rifle to Daniel. He puts Sugar Mama in his bag and pulls out his Glock.
JOEL
Let’s go.
Joel, Daniel, and Bailey run to the entrance.
EXT. AMAZON FACILITY - DAY
Daniel, Joel, and Bailey exit the Amazon facility and run towards the car. One of the black cars stops and a man points a bazooka out the window. He fires and hits their car. The car explodes and Daniel, Joel, and Bailey are knocked to the ground.
The black cars get nearer.
DANIEL
The woods. If we can find Phoenix Ass, we can get to the house.
The three get up and run towards the woods.
The three cars pull into the parking lot next to the flaming car. Men and women get out of the cars. They are the men and women that were watching them back at the house. One of the men ADRIAN (White, 40s) steps forward.
ADRIAN
Follow them. Boss wants them alive.
Adrian’s people run into the woods.
EXT. WOODS - DAY
Daniel, Joel, and Bailey run through the woods. They reach a hiking trail and stop.
JOEL
Did we lose them?
DANIEL
I think so. Let’s keep moving.
The three continue down the trail.
They pass by multiple trail signs. The sun shines brightly upon them. After some time of running, the three-stop. They are covered in sweat. Mosquitoes fly around them. Joel swats at them.
JOEL
Fuck you nature! Daniel are we even on the right trail?
DANIEL
I don’t know.
JOEL
Great, we’re lost.
BAILEY
At least we’re safe. Speaking of which, who the hell were those people?
DANIEL
I don’t know. We should keep moving.
JOEL
Oh c’mon, can’t we just take a small break. I can barely breathe.
BAILEY
Maybe if you worked out more...
JOEL
I work out plenty.
Joel pukes.
JOEL
Running and alcohol do not mix, FYI.
DANIEL
Look, we need to get to the house asap. Let’s go.
The three continue walking through the woods. They pass by a large boulder.
DANIEL
I think this is it. The last time I walked this trail, I saw that boulder.
JOEL
How long is this trail?
DANIEL
Seven miles I think.
Bailey stumbles a little.
DANIEL
You ok?
BAILEY
Yeah. It’s just the heat.
DANIEL
Let’s stop for a sec. Catch our breath.
JOEL
Oh, so you’ll stop for her.
Daniel pulls out a water bottle and gives it to Bailey. She drinks it.
DANIEL
I’ve been thinking. I think I have an idea who those people are.
JOEL
Who?
DANIEL
Boss.
JOEL
Makes sense. Hudson said they were well armed and that they were the only people around here other than us.
DANIEL
He also said that he kills anyone that gets in his way. We were at a place full of supplies. He probably wants it for himself.
Daniel looks ahead down the trail.
DANIEL
I’m gonna go ahead. See if I can find a trail sign. Stay here with her. When she’s ready you two continue.
Joel nods.
Daniel continues down the trail.
Joel checks his Glock. Bailey hands him the water.
JOEL
No thanks.
BAILEY
You need to stay hydrated.
JOEL
I’m fine.
Joel pulls out a can of beer and cracks it open. He begins chugging it. There is a rustle in the woods.
BAILEY
Did you hear that?
JOEL
Yeah.
Joel raises his Glock and points it in the direction of the sound.
Behind him, a gun is put to his head.
Daniel walks down the trail. As he walks he sees the back of houses. He continues down the trail. He stops next to a “Phoenix Ass” sign. He looks at the back of a house. Through the window, he can see Tyler, Greg, and Hudson playing MAGIC: THE GATHERING. Daniel smiles and runs back down the trail.
Daniel reaches the place where he left Joel and Bailey. They are not there.
DANIEL
Joel! Bailey!
A man emerges from the woods and hits Daniel on the back of the head with the butt of his rifle. Daniel falls to the ground unconscious. The man drags Daniel’s body down the trail and places it next to Joel and Bailey’s. They are surrounded by the men and women from the black SUVs. Adrian stands over their unconscious bodies.
ADRIAN
Load them up. Tell the Boss we’ll be bringing guests.
END.

Share this

Related Posts

Previous
Next Post »