Betty is at an HOA meeting.
Anita: All right, one last order of business for tonight: the Fall Run -
Betty: Finally! I’ve been waiting all night for this! I wonder what the theme will be this year.
Tammi: The theme? There’s never been a theme before.
Betty: They did an Olympics edition one year, remember?
Anita - has been canceled.
Betty: Excuse me?
Amelia: This was not discussed!
Anita: It was among us elected members of the association board, and it’s something we had to do.
Betty: I disagree!
Lianne: Is this about money? I am more than willing to help chip in to make it happen.
Anita: No, this is not a financial move. Sometimes, it’s just time to move on.
Betty: Don’t have too much of an ego to accept help! The Fall Run means a lot for our neighborhood!
Anita: Attendance has been down, to be honest. Families are growing up, and without young children, they no longer want to participate. Last year saw an all-time low in entries, and we just felt it was appropriate to move on in order to protect the legacy of this treasured annual event.
Betty: You’re killing it in order to protect it? Where’s the sense in that?
Amelia: Are you just doing this because you can’t enter anymore?
Anita: Excuse me?
Teri: This is getting good now.
Amelia: You divorced your husband, so he and his family didn’t participate last year. You had to join the Bellwoods.
Anita: That is a disgusting lie.
Amelia: Which part? That you’re divorced or that you participated with the Bellwoods last year?
Anita: That I’ve canceled the Fall Run for personal reasons! I’m a leader for all, I would never do that.
Betty: Yes, you would!
Anita: You would believe any slander about me!
Betty: Not true! Your husband called you the devil, and I didn’t believe him, because I know that that’s my sister-in-law! The worst woman I’ve ever known, at least she’s finally dead.
Alysa: You hated her even worse than my mom?
Betty: Yes!
Anita: Alysa, why are you sitting with them and not backing up your dear old mother?
Alysa: I live with them.
Amelia: See! She’s alone in that big old house, this event clearly just reminds her of everything she’s lost!
Anita: That is enough! This meeting is adjourned, I refuse to listen to more attacks on my character. The Fall Run is a thing of the past, that is final.
Later that night…
Betty: I am so pissed!
Karl: What did Anita do now?
Teri: How did you ever guess?
Karl: I know my wife.
Jerry: Unfortunately for you.
Cindy slaps Jerry.
Jerry: What was that for?
Cindy: You’re gonna get her going.
Jerry: She’s already going!
Cindy: Then you’ll keep her going!
Betty: Anita has decided to cancel the Fall Run.
Steven: Oh no!
Ralph: Thank god!
Betty: Steven, that’s the spirit. Ralph, I’m disappointed in you.
Karl: What’s her reasoning? Is she just the fun police?
Alysa: Can we all try to remember that this is my mother we’re talking about?
Steven: Babe… don’t remind them. We don’t need them taking it out on you.
Alysa: I think they’re mature enough to not… yeah, good point.
Betty: She claims that participation is down so much that it’s not worth the effort of putting the event together. Something about families growing up and basically outgrowing it.
Ralph: Yeah, I do suspect that we’re the outlier in still being so invested in this well into our forties, fifties, sixties, and seventies.
Betty: I don’t see why we should get punished for everyone else not caring.
Teri: Sometimes things just come to a natural end.
Betty: So you support this? You support Anita?
Teri: If the sign-ups are low, I do understand why they aren’t bothering to go through the trouble.
Betty: Sign-ups aren’t low! It was packed last year!
Jerry: Do you know how many sign-ups were so far this year?
Betty: They never opened up sign-ups! That’s how I know this was rigged! Anita saw us dominating year after year and, for her own ego, decided to put an end to it. That’s all! It’s very upsetting to me, but not a surprise. She’s always had it out for me.
Alysa: I don’t think it’s that. She participated with all of us last year. Why would she go from that to canceling the whole thing to spite you guys?
Betty: I don’t know, Alysa. She’s your mom, you know her mind doesn’t work like the rest of ours does.
Alysa: I think she’s just ready to move on from it, and knows that most of the neighborhood does’t really care. I’m sad it’s over, but I know that she kinda has a point. Every year, fewer and fewer families took part. The families that did take part got smaller.
Jeanette: I’m kind of upset about this, I’ve heard so much about it, and now I’ll never get to take part!
Rick: Thank god.
Jeanette: Excuse me?
Rick: We’re in our eighties. The last thing we need is to break a hip in some silly neighborhood game.
Jeanette: I think I’m far more physically abled than you believe!
Rick: You literally broke your hip this year.
Jeanette: That was a freak accident!
Rick: It was an eighty year old falling. That happens constantly.
Teri: I feel like we’re witnessing a marital dispute that isn’t really any of our business.
Jerry: We witness one of those every day.
Ralph: And they never involve Teri, because she’s alone!
Teri: So are you!
Ralph: By choice!
Danielle: Look, none of the three of us can mock anyone for being old spinsters. We’re all alone, we’ll die alone, we’ve accepted it.
Teri: I haven’t accepted it!
Betty: Neither have I! I still want grandchildren!
Tammi: You have grandchildren!
Jerry: I think she wants better ones.
Tammi: Dad, that’s awful!
Betty: Anyway, I have a plan to save the Fall Run!
Teri: Oh, not again.
Frank: Yeah, I forgot it was canceled before.
Betty: And I saved it! And I’ll do it again!
Teri: Anita seemed very definitive this time. I think it’s done forever.
Betty: I still have an ace up my sleeve!
Jerry: I can’t wait to hear this.
Betty: I’ve decided I’m running for the HOA board in next month’s election! Someone has to fix this mess… why not me?
Teri: Mom… you’re almost eighty.
Ralph: Yeah, at that age, a presidential run is much more suitable.
Betty: Are you implying I’m too old for the HOA?
Teri: I don’t think this is the time in your life to add even more to your plate. You own a store -
Betty: Which is such a great argument for why I should be elected! I’m a business owner, I invested in this community and I have enriched it. I’m responsible, I have community ties, I’m a friend of our home-grown governor, I’m the perfect choice for the board. So put me on it so I can get to work!
Cindy: Are you campaigning to us?
Betty: I’m just pitching my argument for why I should be elected. I have to refine it before I take it to the voters.
Teri: I just don’t think this is a good idea. And you know I usually don’t try interrupting your insane plans. So that really shows you how nuts I think this is!
Frank: I don’t think it’s so bad.
Betty: Shut u- no, wait. Thank you, Frank.
Teri: Hell has frozen over.
Frank: I think Betty would be good on the HOA board. She’s very dedicated to the neighborhood, she’s always got opinions on what we should do around here, and her fights with Anita would be very funny.
Teri: I’m not sold.
Betty: I just can’t sit by in silence while the current board tries to take away the fun events we have to look forward to.
Cindy: Mom, it was canceled because no one really cared about it anymore. I don’t know if running on saving the Fall Run is going to be the popular platform that gets you elected.
Ralph: Yeah, most people don’t tend to base their vote on the candidates’ positions on the annual fall festival.
Betty: This is an issue that actually affects the voters.
Teri: You know, we could just have a family game night and let you win and avoid all of this.
Betty: No! It wouldn’t be the same! The Fall Run is sacred!
Teri: Oh my god.
Karl: Guys, you just have to let this take its course.
Steven: Aren’t the ballots printed by now?
Betty: I’ll run as a write-in candidate!
Ralph: At some point, we have to try to stop her from chasing her delusions. It’s like living with Don Quixote!
The next day…
Anita: Betty, what are you doing?
Betty: Surprised to see me here?
Anita: For many reasons. Why are you putting lawn signs up with your name on them?
Betty: I’m running for the HOA board!
Anita: Oh, dear god, why?
Betty: First of all, I want you to remember you’re talking to a friend of our commonwealth’s governor, and she is getting back to me on an endorsement!
Anita: Okay. Why are you running? I thought we were mostly past this idiotic feud, for the sake of the kids.
Betty: I thought so, too, and then you murdered the Fall Run.
Anita: Jesus, Joseph, and Mary, are you kidding me?
Betty: I don’t joke about the Fall Run! You know that!
Anita: I don’t think it’s as serious to most people as you’re making it out to be.
Betty: I disagree.
Anita: Why are you wasting your money and time running some quixotic campaign over something this silly? You own a store, go spend your time there.
Betty: You just know I will bring a reckoning upon the HOA board if I get elected!
Anita: You’re not going to. No write-in candidate has ever won, for good reason - no one cares enough about the HOA to bother writing anyone’s name in!
Betty: Not this year! I’m going to start a movement!
Anita: Betty, I don’t want to be your enemy. I think we can work together here on a solution.
Betty: You bring the Fall Run back, I drop my campaign. It’s $250 I spent on signs down the drain, but I’d be okay with that. It’s worth it to bring the Fall Run back!
Anita: You are insane.
Betty: I’m dedicated!
Anita: I don’t know why this means so much to you.
Betty: It’s about family. We do this every year together… as a family. It’s been almost ten years now, I have so many memories. Some of those memories are with people I don’t even see anymore. Some of them are from when my great-grandson was so young, and before so much changed for him. I just think about those old days and it brings me joy. I don’t want the Fall Run to be gone.
Anita: It brings me pain, Betty. I know that makes you happy, but it does.
Betty: It doesn’t have to! We had fun last year!
Anita: So you consider me part of your family?
Betty: Let’s not take it that far. But you are the mother of someone who is, and I don’t want you to feel lonely.
Anita: Sign-ups really are low, though.
Betty: We can try to do something about it! Maybe we raise the promo budget. Or we can try to modernize it! Bring in new challenges, something to appeal to a wider range of ages. I don’t know, but it’s worth saving.
Anita: It’s too late this year.
Betty: All right, that’s fine. But next year, when I’m on the HOA board…
Anita: You’re still running? Even after I didn’t immediately shut down your idea?
Betty: I think we can work well together, and make some progress on this!
Anita: All right. But even if you lose, I do want your input on modernizing the Fall Run for next year. I agree it’s too important to just end it, but we do have to put time into fixing it.
Betty: So what I’m hearing is I’ve saved the Fall Run? Mission accomplished?
Anita: You’ve put us on the path towards doing so.
Betty: I haven’t even won yet and I’m already making change! God, I’m good!
What did you think of this episode of Our House? Let us know in the comments and make sure to read the new episode next week!
