Milton is in a meeting with fellow members of Senate Democrat leadership.
Kate: Before we go, we have great news to discuss regarding the upcoming elections. Milton, you want to discuss your candidate recruitment efforts?
Milton: Well, Kate, I really appreciate being given the chance to chair the campaign committee again. 2024 was a year of great success for us, and obviously the 2025 Illinois special did not go our way, but things are promising for 2026. After months of recruiting him former governor Oscar Millford is officially jumping into the senate race in Maine.
Ellie: Very exciting! I want Sharon Campbell gone more than anything. Her and Olivia Stowe have the most irritating feud, and it would be fantastic to never have to hear about it again.
Milton: Well, that’s the hope! We also have convinced congresswoman Janelle Dearman to run in Kansas in what will probably be a close race, and we’re also strongly targeting Iowa and have some fantastic candidates there, but we’re not wading into that primary.
Kate: Very good, Milton. How’s the polling looking?
Milton: Well, polls showing Millford up six points on Campbell helped convince him to give it a try after an eight-year political hiatus. Both major candidates in Iowa are within a point of Emmer. Dearman is down two.
Ellie: How is Montana looking?
Milton: Senator Hardrict retiring will be a blow to our chances there, but it’s looking close. Their attorney general is running and he’s polling well against congressman Coates.
Kate: So are we thinking maybe a gain of three or four?
Milton: That’s the best-case scenario. I would consider Maine and Mississippi to be the most likely flips. Alaska, Iowa and Kansas are all possibilities.
Ellie: Is Texas not a possibility? How about Missouri? Both are open seats.
Milton: We don’t want to stretch ourselves too thin. If the polling is looking promising, we’ll make investments there. For now, those look like single-digit losses. Theoretically close, but major hills to climb.`
Kate: Well, still lots of encouraging news. Thanks, Milton.
Milton: Glad to be of assistance.
Ellie: And since we’ve now gone through every other important order of business, we’re going to close out the meeting by reminding you all that my birthday is next week and I love gifts!
Kate: Ellie…
Ellie: I’m going to be seventy! No pressure, but again, gifts make me happy.
Kate: You don’t have to buy her gifts.
Senator Melody Choi: When we say gifts are we thinking, like… socks or -
Ellie: No, a real gift.
Kate: Oh my god.
Ellie: What? If they’re looking to get me something -
Kate: You just instructed them to!
Ellie: I want it to one something good.
Melody: Edible Arrangement?
Ellie: I’ll send you a wishlist.
Kate: Oh, my heavens.
Ellie: I especially expect something special from you.
Kate: Of course you do. Everyone, you’re free to go. I’m not going to keep you hostage here as Ellie lists off her birthday demands.
Ellie: They aren’t demands. They’re suggestions. It’s a big birthday.
Milton: I’ll make sure to get you something good.
Ellie: Don’t forget to remind your sister, too!
Kate: You don’t have to do that.
Ellie: Stop raining on my parade!
Later that night, Kate calls Marietta.
Marietta: What’s my brother up to? Is he annoying you?
Kate: No, not at all! Why’d you think that?
Marietta: It’s pretty late.
Kate: You guys are an hour behind us! Can’t stay up as late as you used to as you get older?
Marietta: I’m a very busy woman. By nightfall…
Kate: I understand. Being Senate Majority Leader isn’t the wild, fun and fancy free life you may expect it to be. I actually have to have meetings with the president. I hate that guy!
Marietta: I’m guessing this is not merely a call to tell me I’m old and that you dislike the president, and we’ve already cleared up that it’s not about Milton, so what’s it really about?
Kate: I don’t know what your schedule looks like, and I’m not going to hold it against you if you can’t make it on such short notice, but Ellie’s birthday is coming up, it’s her seventieth; I want to throw a party for her. It’ll be next Saturday, and all of her closest friends are going to be invited.
Marietta: Is it a surprise party?
Kate: I don’t know. Obviously, I have to ensure that she’s here in DC, since she’d usually go home for the weekend. So I might just have to tell he we’re having a party.
Marietta: For what it’s worth, I don’t think it not being a surprise would hurt her enjoyment of it in any way.
Kate: No, I agree. She’d love knowing that people will soon be giving her plenty of attention. Attention is her favorite thing.
Marietta: I don’t think I have anything going that day, I can probably make it.
Kate: Good! She was just yammering on today about her birthday, so she was clearly dropping hints about wanting us to make a big deal of it. Heck, she even mentioned you by name.
Marietta: What did she say about me?
Kate: She wants an gift from you.
Marietta: That’s entirely unsurprising.
Kate: Exactly. She gets swept up by these things.
Marietta: Do you have any gift ideas? I want to make sure to please her majesty.
Kate: Anything will do. She’ll just be glad to be the center off attention.
Marietta: I gotta say, Kate. I’m shocked you were able to get enough time away from her to call me about this party.
Kate: I think you all have a misinformed view of just how much time we spend together. We’re not joined at the hip.
Marietta: Just like me and Tammy.
Kate: No, you two are joined at the hip. She moved to New Orleans for you. Do you not understand how insane that is? She’s the former first lady, New York’s longtime senator, and she left to work with you across the country!
Marietta: I am special in that way. People feel drawn to me.
Kate: No one likes a braggart.
Marietta: It’s not bragging. I know Ellie will do the same for you one day!
Kate: I don’t plan on ever running for mayor of Charlotte.
Marietta: Oh, who’s bragging now?
The next night…
Patty Lynn: Anything exciting at work today?
Marietta: Not really, no.
Kathleen: Being mayor seems boring.
Marietta: And here I was, thinking you’d run to succeed me.
Kathleen: Do you think I’d win?
Patty Lynn: You’re eighty years old!
Kathleen: A youthful eighty!
Marietta: I think you could win. You’re a skilled politician.
Kathleen: I haven’t run in a long time
Patty Lynn: And you did it in Arkansas.
Kathleen: What are you implying about Arkansas?
Patty Lynn: Nothing, but it says a lot that you’re immediately getting defensive about it.
Kathleen: Because you always try insulting my home state.
Patty Lynn: Your home state is Louisiana. You just moved to Arkansas because you fashion yourself a rebel.
Marietta: Are you two done?
Kathleen: She started it.
Patty Lynn: I did not!
Marietta: Nothing exciting happened at work today, but I did get a very special invite last night.
Patty Lynn: What sort of invite?
Marietta: Another high school reunion?
Marietta: God, no. I’m gonna be heading up to DC next Saturday - if that’s allowed - to attend Ellie’s 70th birthday party.
Patty Lynn: Why would that not be allowed? I’ll go with!
Marietta: Well, that’s uh -you want to go with?
Patty Lynn: Yeah! I love Ellie! She’s fun!
Kathleen: Does this mean I have to go with, too? Your mother needs a constant supervisor.
Patty Lynn: I can take care of myself!
Kathleen: Thank god, a weekend at home alone! I’ll be like Kevin McCallister.
Marietta: Aside from being ten times his age.
Kathleen: Yeah, aside from that.
Patty Lynn: I’m so excited for our trip, Marietta! I’m gonna go out and find something special for Ellie’s birthday!
Marietta: You do that! And maybe also pick something out for me to give her.
Patty Lynn: No! A gift has to be from the heart! No one else can pick it out for you!
Marietta: Of course you would say that.
The next week…
Ellie: Brian, I just can’t believe that I’m seventy.
Brian (Ellie’s husband): You don’t look a day older than the day I met you!
Ellie: okay, you can cut the crap with that. I may feel younger than I am, but I’m certainly smart enough to know I don’t look twenty-six.
Brian: You do to me!
Ellie: We’re gonna get your eyes checked. I think that would be for the best. Just to be safe.
Brian: I can’t pay you a compliment, but if I don’t pay you one, then that’s also an issue.
Ellie: I’d rather it just be a realistic compliment.
Brian: Got it. Well, you do look fantastic.
Ellie: I’m quite aware of that, dear.
Brian: I’m glad.
Ellie: do you ever sit and wonder how our lives have flown by so quickly?
Brian: I try not to think about it. I like to live in the moment.
Ellie: It’s just incomprehensible to me. Seventy years old? I’m not ready to be, you know, old. I don’t feel old.
Brian: You’re not old!
Ellie: I’m about a decade into qualifying for the senior discount at the movies.
Brian: Age is a number. It’s all about how you feel. And you feel youthful. That keeps you young at heart, so keep it up.
Ellie: Do you ever think about retirement?
Brian: I can’t say I do. Do you?
Ellie: Nope! I love my job, I love working with Kate, I am dedicated to seeing this country.
Brian: Good! You’re great at it.
Ellie: I will say, though, while I hate aging, I do love a good birthday.
Brian: Don’t worry, In have a lot planned. It’s going to be a great night.
Ellie: I hope my colleagues all got me gifts. I have been subtly dropping hints.
Brian: You don’t do much subtly.
Ellie: I did with this. I’m very smooth with it.
Brian: I guess I have to take your word for it.
Ellie: I’m a very honest woman.
Brian: I’m well aware.
Later that day…
Ellie: Kate, anything to say to me?
Kate: Happy birthday, Ellie.
Ellie: why, thank you! How ever did you know? Where’s my present?
Kate: We have a meeting with the president today.
Ellie: On my birthday?
Kate: you want me to ask him to reschedule?
Ellie: Could you?
Kate: Ellie…
Ellie: You offered!
Kate: I figured you weren’t actually delusional enough to think I was being serious.
Ellie: My birthday is starting off on the wrong note here.
Kate: You’re right. Come in, I got your favorite donuts and that New Orleans coffee you like.
Ellie: Is that what Marietta got me for my birthday?
Kate: No, I bought it on Amazon.
Ellie: You know I don’t care for Amazon.
Kate: None of us do. It’s a necessary evil. Like going to the dentist, and funding foreign wars.
Ellie: I didn’t vote to fund any foreign wars!
Kate: But most of the Senate did, and we don’t like to talk about it.
Melody: Ellie, happy birthday! I got you this, because I’m not gonna be in town for -
Kate: Sh!
Melody: For nothing. Just pretend I stopped right there.
Ellie: Is this socks? It feels like socks. I thought I said no socks?
Melody: It’s not socks.
Ellie: I’m gonna open it later, just in case it’s socks.
Melody: I promise it’s not.
Ellie: But if it is, I will melt down. I’m sorry to say it, I don’t want to sound like a brat, but I will.
Kate: Let’s just go in my office and enjoy those donuts.
Ellie: I had a pretty big breakfast -
Kate: You’re eating the damn donuts.
Ellie: Got it. Donuts. Love donuts.
In Kate’s office…
Kate: Ellie, I have something to tell you.
Ellie: Did you forget my birthday and the donuts are my present?
Kate: No. But, you have to stop with the presents. You’re seventy, not seven.
Ellie: So I can’t love whimsy just because I’m old?
Kate: No, we just don’t need the senate majority whip acting like a toddler who didn’t get the Barbie she wanted for Christmas.
Ellie: I never had Barbie growing up. My parents didn’t feel it was appropriate. They didn’t want me to dream of spending money on expensive and fancy clothes. We were simple people.
Kate: Well, you still dress like an accountant, so that’s clearly stuck with you throughout your life.
Ellie: There’s something wrong with the way I dress?
Kate: Not at all! Accountants are very stylish!
Ellie: So what did you have to tell me?
Kate: We’re having a 70th birthday party for you on Saturday.
Ellie: For little old me?
Kate: Indeed.
Ellie: Why, I’m honored!
Kate: I wanted it to be a surprise, but -
Ellie: No, I like it better this way. It allows me to hype myself up, this is gonna make my whole week. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Kate: It’s a big birthday! I want it to be special for you!
Ellie: You’re the greatest!
Kate: I try to be.
Saturday, at Ellie’s party…
Kate: She’s on her way, guys! She does know about the party, but she’s got no clue who is coming here for it.
Tammy: I flew from Louisiana for this, I better get a big reaction from her.
Moira: Does she know who I am? I was forced to be here.
Milton: She was at our wedding, honey!
Moira: Drunk.
Milton: We’ve spent holidays together.
Moira: She’s quite self-centered.
Kate: All right, let’s get air out all the Ellie grievances before she arrives. It’s her birthday, not Festivus.
Patty Lynn: There are so many senators here, it’s so cool.
Milton: That’s the first time anyone has ever said that sentence.
Ten minutes later…
Kate: Okay, she busted texted me and said she’s here.
Tammy: Texting while parking? Tsk-tsk.
Kate: I think Brian drove her.
Tammy: Even worse, Ellie was texting me earlier this week about how he’s losing his eyesight.
Ellie: My goodness! Look at all these smiling faces!
Marietta: Happy birthday, Ellie!
Ellie: Oh, you all flew up from Louisiana just for me.
Patty Lynn: Of course we did! It’s your special day! You only turn seventy once!
Milton: Trust me, she’s tried to turn it more than once. It didn’t work.
Patty Lynn: Don’t act like I haven’t aged with grace.
Milton: Who’s Grace?
Ellie: Melody! You lied to me!
Melody: I didn’t get you socks!
Ellie: You said you were going to be out of town!
Melody: I was told to keep my attendance a secret for you.
Ellie: I really never expected all of you guys to show up just for me. I’m getting very emotional.
Tammy: Wait until she sees the Ellie-themed We Are the World-type song Kate made us record.
Milton: None of us can even sing.
Melody: Hey, speak for yourself!
Milton: Oh, I speak for many of us.
Marietta: It’s completely deserved, Ellie. You’ve changed all of our lives.
Kate: Boy, have you.
Ellie: That didn’t sound entirely positive.
Kate: Look, it’s not easily constantly being perceived as your partner in crime. But I love ya. Happy birthday.
What did you think of this episode of Marietta? Let us know in the comments and make sure to read a new episode next week!
