Season 3 Episode 6
Written by
William Fry & Michael Ledesma
INT. CAFETERIA - DAY
The group sits at a table in the university cafeteria. They sit silently eating.
EDISON
I can’t believe he won. Biden
actually won.
SARAH
Yes, that’s usually what happens when you get more electoral votes than the other candidate.
EDISON
But... but what about Trump?
MEGAN
Don’t worry buddy, he can run
again.
ANDREW
You know what, I’m sick of talking politics.
MEGAN
Is that because you got hit in the head with a beer bottle after giving a speech about how politics divide us.
ANDREW
Yes, yes, it is. You know I got a concussion from that.
SARAH
Mild concussion. The doctor said
it was mild.
ANDREW
Still a concussion. Look, we’re
all feeling a little… emotional
about the results of the election. I’m sure everyone is. That’s why I have a fantastic idea to help us get over it.
SARAH
What?
ANDREW
Three words, Dat… Party… Tho.
Edison’s eyes widen and grins.
EDISON
It’s been a while since we threw
one.
ANDREW
I know.
EDISON
Let’s do it.
SARAH
I don’t know. We’ve kind of been through a lot and the semester isn’t even over. Is a party really a good idea?
EDISON
That’s exactly WHY we need this.
Something to let off steam.
MEGAN
I agree. If anyone needs this,
it’s me.
SARAH
How are you doing?
MEGAN
I’m good. I think I’m ready to
date again. Might try men.
Andrew and Edison stare at Megan.
ANDREW & EDISON
Really?
SARAH
ANDREW
I-I know.
EDISON
I don’t.
Megan raises her eyebrows at Edison.
ANDREW
Okay then, looks like “Dat Party
Tho II” is happening.
SARAH
Maybe this time we can make it
legal and not have alcohol.
EDISON
Sarah don’t ruin this.
INT. APARTMENT- NIGHT
The group sets out snacks and drinks and party decorations. Megan fills a cooler with beer. Edison walks over next to her.
EDISON
Where do you get all this beer?
MEGAN
I have people.
Students start showing up and the party begins. Students drink, laugh, and dance. The group stand next to each against the wall.
EDISON
Another success.
SARAH
You know, if you put in as much
work into school as you do at
these parties, I bet you could
make the honors roll.
EDISON
Does the honors roll involve
alcohol?
Well, no but-
EDISON
Then no.
Edison scans the party. His eyes grow big.
EDISON
Oh… my… gosh.
ANDREW
What?
EDISON
We are so fucked.
SARAH
Not if we limit the amount we
drink.
EDISON
No, look.
Edison points in the crowd. In the crowd of partying students, is Calvin, Gabby, Paige, and Samantha.
ANDREW
Oh man, we are so fucked.
MEGAN
Yes. Yes, we are.
SARAH
Oh relax. I’m sure they're over us by now.
The four exes walk up to the group.
CALVIN
Well well well, if it isn’t the
heartbreakers.
ANDREW
Wait, do people really call us
that?
GABBY
Some people do.
Hey Gabby.
GABBY
(Coldly)
Andrew.
EDISON
What the hell are you all doing
here?
CALVIN
We couldn’t miss “Dat Party Tho”.
GABBY
Yeah.
PAIGE
I still live above you.
MEGAN
(To Samantha)
And what are YOU doing here.
SAMANTHA
I was hoping we could talk.
EDISON
Okay, I get that each of you hate us for your own reasons, but this is a party. Not Jerry Springer.
CALVIN
No problem, we’re here to party
too.
The four exes return to the party.
ANDREW
That was traumatizing.
MEGAN
Let’s just kick them out. It IS
our apartment.
EDISON
Oh, shit you’re right. I’ll go
tell them to get lost.
SARAH
What the hell is wrong with you
people. They’re just here to
party.
EDISON
Do you really want your ex here?
SARAH
Our breakup was fine. Sort of. Actually, now that I think about it, there was some crying. Oh man, I am a heartbreaker.
ANDREW
You broke up with him to be with
me. Remember?
SARAH
But we didn’t get together right
away. You were with Gabby.
MEGAN
Who you broke up with after taking ecstasy.
ANDREW
Yeahhhhhh, probably shouldn’t have done that. But at least I didn’t break up with a girl because my ex flew back to the country.
EDISON
My ex aka my future wife, was
back. How could I miss an
opportunity like that?
SARAH
I’m going to go talk to Calvin and apologize.
ANDREW
I’m going to do the same with
Gabby. Edison, you should do the
same with Paige.
EDISON
You really need to work on your
sense of humor.
I’m serious.
EDISON
Fine. What about you Megan?
SARAH
Megan doesn't have to do shit. She can kick Samantha out.
Megan smiles.
MEGAN
Thanks girl.
SARAH
I got you girl.
The group disperses. Sarah walks over to Calvin.
SARAH
Hey.
CALVIN
Sarah.
SARAH
Look, I’m sorry for the way things ended. It’s just... we weren't meant to be.
CALVIN
Thanks. For the apology.
SARAH
I really am sorry.
CALVIN
Do you love him? Andrew?
SARAH
Yeah. I really do.
CALVIN
Well, I’m glad you’re with someone you love.
SARAH
Thanks.
Besides, I’m with another girl.
Fashion major.
SARAH
Oh wowwwwwwww.
Andrew walks over to Gabby.
ANDREW
Heyyyyyy girl. Are you enjoying
the party?
GABBY
Kind of. Of course, the last time I was at a party, my ex-boyfriend broke up with me after taking ecstasy.
ANDREW
Yeah about that, sorry. I wasn't
exactly thinking straight. I
should’ve waited until the next
day.
GABBY
Just help me understand. You clearly had feelings for her while we were dating. Why didn’t you just end it sooner? Before things got serious.
ANDREW
I-I don’t know. I did have
feelings for Sarah, but I also had
them for you. You helped me kind
of move on.
GABBY
So, I was a rebound.
ANDREW
That would indicate that Sarah and I were sleeping together which we weren’t. Look, I fucked up. I’m sorry. You have every right to hate me. But at least I ended things before they got any more serious. I mean, can you imagine
wedding day, I just decided to
leave you at the alter-
Gabby glares at Andrew.
ANDREW
And I’m rambling. Okay, my point
is, I’m sorry. For everything.
Gabby contemplates Andrew’s apology.
GABBY
Okay fine. We’re cool. But I still hate your guts though.
ANDREW
Fair enough.
Edison walks over to Paige.
EDISON
Okay before acting on your urge to kill me, let me at least explain why I did what I did.
PAIGE
I’m listening.
EDISON
You remember Brittaney? Well, the day we broke up-
PAIGE
You mean the day YOU broke up with me.
EDISON
Yeah, well she was back in the
country.
PAIGE
So?
EDISON
Soooo, she’s like the only girl
I’ve ever truly loved.
PAIGE
So, I was a rebound.
No, I jumped off a balcony to prove that. You were just... I’m really struggling for an analogy.
PAIGE
You are a terrible person.
EDISON
I beg to differ. Just yesterday I gave five bucks to a homeless guy. You know how much you can buy with five dollars at McDonalds?
PAIGE
I cried for days after you dumped me. Days Edison. My grades suffered. I loved you and you just threw me aside like I was a wrapper. I hate you Edison.
EDISON
Hate is a strong word.
Paige splashes her drink on Edison’s face and leaves.
EDISON
That... went better than expected.
Megan approaches Samantha.
SAMANTHA
Can we talk?
MEGAN
No, get out.
SAMANTHA
Megan please.
MEGAN
This party is for good people. Not people who dumps someone over the phone.
SAMANTHA
I messed up. I know I did. But
I’ve had time to think.
MEGAN
So, have I and I've concluded that you are a terrible person. Now leave.
Samantha turns and leaves.
The group reconvenes.
SARAH
Well, I don’t know about you all, but I feel better.
ANDREW
Same.
MEGAN
Same. Edison?
EDISON
Uhhhh yeah same.
ANDREW
Edison.
EDISON
Okay fine, Paige and I didn’t exactly make up. But we DID talk.
Sarah walks up to Edison and grabs his face squishing his cheeks.
SARAH
You listen to me; you go make a real apology to that girl or I'll neuter you for real. Kapeesh?
EDISON
Kaposh.
Sarah releases Edison and he leaves.
ANDREW
You wouldn’t actually neuter him, would you?
SARAH
Of course not.
ANDREW
Good, just checking.
Edison knocks on Paige's door. Paige opens it.
EDISON
You’re right, I am a terrible person and I did a terrible thing to you. I should have done things differently.
Paige stares at Edison.
EDISON
Are we good?
Paige continues staring at Edison.
EDISON
Would hitting me make you feel
better?
Paige punches Edison. Edison stumbles to the ground.
PAIGE
You know what, I do feel a little better.
EDISON
Good to know.
Paige closes the door.
INT. APARTMENT - NIGHT
Edison rejoins the group. His nose is bruised.
SARAH
What the hell happened?
EDISON
I apologized.
The group watches the students party.
EDISON
Tell me, did anything good
actually come out of this?
Among the crowd of students, Calvin and Gabby are making out.
ANDREW
I think so.
Andrew holds Sarah’s hand. The two looks at each other and smile. Edison sees this. He grabs Megan’s hand. Megan looks at Edison confused. Edison shrugs. Megan smiles.
END.